Is there one proper way or the best way to text a guy, in this dating age? Nope, there is not only one single pattern that you should follow, by all means. But, guidelines, yes, guidelines exist; They can help you to master the texting game.
First things first, texting guys and texting your friends is not the same. Men and women communicate differently. Most guys like the short and simple way whereas you and your girls can write a novel with one another.
Get to know his texting habits, closely
Sync the length of conversation with the type of the texter. Know closely what type of a texter your guy is.
- – Does he text constantly, or once a week?
- – Uses emojis all the time?
- – Is he the novelist type?
The constant texter: He is that type of guy who texts shortly but texts every day. When you text with him, keep it short and simple in order to arouse his curiosity. Be mysterious since you are texting every day. Do not reveal all about yourself in just one simple text.
The one that uses emojis all the time: There is that type of guy that likes to use emojis all the time. In this case, do not be afraid to use emojis too. It will now make him run away. On the contrary, it will get close to you. Use funny ones, adapt them to your situation.
The Novelist one a.k.a the one that likes long paragraphs: Even though most of the guys do not like your convos to be very long, he might be a guy who likes longer texts.
Text him a little bit longer but always avoid unnecessary information.
Getting to know his texting habits will allow you to know how to intrigue him.
When you know the type of texters, now it is time to get to know these points:
- Find out what his texting patterns/habits are. If he likes to use emojis or text longer, or only text once a week, only in the evening, or maybe early in the morning. Who knows. Investigate!
- Let’s make it clear who he is to you. Have you known him only online, had a few dates with him, is he your boyfriend?
- Is texting the form of communication that he wants to have with you?
- While texting with him, find why he uses texting for. To say only ‘Thank You’ to someone, make plans, find a girl that he likes, or flirt over text?
- He might not be a texting enthusiast, so mind out.
Yet, lessons should be learned. I encourage you to do as you feel and think it is right to use the following tips; Adjust them to the situation you are in.
Take these 13 ways as guidelines and not as strict rules. For further details let’s dive into these 13 ways on how to text to keep him interested in you:
1. First, be YOUnique while texting: Do not provide ‘false’ info about you
Sometimes we try to send text messages in a way that seems ‘interesting’ to a guy that we are texting. But deep down you know that in fact, that is not what A REAL YOU would do.
Let him know what you like, what your hobbies are, what makes you go up and dance, what your life motto is. Everyone is unique in their own way. And faking is very repelling to guys.
If you text and say for example that you like basketball but then during the first dates this pops up in your conversation and you are tongue-tied. It will be a huge turn-off for him.
You want to talk with him about basketball, okay then! Surf on the internet, learn about basketball and if you start to like it: Make it your passion too! But don’t lie about it, keep it real and honest.
2. Initiate texting too: Here’s when and how you should do it
Texting is made for two, hence initiating or ending the conversation should be kept in balance.
- Keeping a balance in texting will allow him to take a step himself in order to impress you. This will keep the strings attached.
It is not wrong if you are the one who initiates the conversation. But know when to lead it and when to pause. Know when to take your time.
Remember if you are the only one initiating the conversation, it will make him a little bitter towards you. He is a guy, he wants to take the lead but he does not have the space to do it if you are doing this all the time.
If you are the one who initiated the last two or three conversations, let him do it now.
3. Spice up the texting game/Add a humorous tone to it
Do you want to know what to say to a guy you are talking to in order to keep him all engaged?
Well, once Robin Scherbatsky said: ‘I’ve got to stop making jokes in emails. It’s so hard to convey tone!’ I know we are not sending emails to him but you get the point.
Send him hilarious texts; I don’t recommend stopping making jokes. What I suggest you do is know when to use them, and keep in mind that he can’t hear your tone of voice through your text messages.
You can use these texts to pique his interest:
1. Do you have a map? Cuz’ I am lost in you *insert a tongue out emoji*
2. I have turned into Casper waiting for your reply 🤣
3. If you were a pizza topping, what would you be?
4. Be honest, which emoji makes you think of me?
5. Who is the funniest person you know? Me right? JK
Over and above, beware of using sarcastic language. Some jokes and funny phrases can be misunderstood while texting.
Especially if you are talking to a guy you have met only online. He might not be that familiar with your tone/sense of humor.
4. Balance your replying time: Keep it compelling and fresh
Creating an equilibrium of knowing when and how to reply, helps in keeping it all fresh!
I know, right now you might think ‘why on earth should I follow this advice?’ But trust me it strengthens your texting bond. It helps you set your ‘Texting Standards’.
If you are in your early stages of talking/dating, I wouldn’t suggest texting after 11 pm too often. You might send him the wrong message.
At this stage, you want to text him in order to get to know him better and have a special conversation. Nothing exaggerated.
Texting him too late might give him ‘Booty Call’ vibes. He might start to think that it is okay if you text only late at night.
Also, do not be that texter that takes forever to reply. Take your time but still go and reply to that text when you can.
A lot of women think that if they take a lot of time to reply to a guy, it will arouse his curiosity. Hate to break it to you but it doesn’t work that way.
Being a slow, dull, replier makes him frustrated and he will jump to other conversations, like immediately!
5. Do not jump into texting when you are: Emotional, Mad, or just Bored
The one mistake you might make while texting is to text when you are a little bit off. When you do not feel well, you are emotional, or just mad, resist the temptation to immediately text him.
Your negative vibe will reflect while texting. I know that everyone knows what a bad day is, but texting during this phase will impact his interest in you.
If you text him while you are bored the conversation might lead you to a boring conversation too; It can get very dull and monotonous. Being mad or having a bad day can be discussed vis-a-vis.
6. Keep it all interesting, let’s not text him for no reason
We have tackled this matter a little bit earlier on in this article. Once you grab your phone, you should know why you are texting this guy.
Is it because you miss him, you have to tell him something exciting, you want to make plans with him, or you just have been fixated and chose to text?
So, first, you should create healthy texting habits; While developing these habits you will learn how to keep the attention of the guy that you like or your boyfriend.
- You might text him to let him know you are thinking of him. But do it with style.
Let him know that you have heard a song and it reminded you of a conversation that you had; or anything else specific to keep it hot and interesting.
If you just text “Hi” or “Hey, what are you doing?”, it might just make him grab his phone, see the message and not reply. To avoid dullness and frustration on both sides, you should have a prior reason to text.
What I recommend you to do is: Set a goal, why do you want to text him? Thus, you will have some kind of scheme that will help you to make the texting flow naturally.
7. Ask him questions: though avoid applying ‘Machine Gun Texting’ to your convo!
Questions are seen as a safe tool for texting. But that can be tricky when suddenly you start to use repetitive and closed-ended questions.
Use questions to keep the text conversation with going, but keep in mind to avoid Machine Gun Texting a.k.a Shooting Generic Questions, that’ll lead you to one side conversation and a lack of interest.
Now you say, yeah right, but how to do it? After you have set the reason why you are texting him, make precise, fun, and easy-to-understand questions.
Know how to wait for his reply and how to continue your text conversation. Set a style to your conversation that will be easy to follow and adjust.
Imagine this, you texted him three different questions but wanted to know the same thing.
“Hey, what did you do today?” “How did you spend your day?” “Anything funny from today?”
Sending these questions in a row and within a few hours, can make him uncomfortable. He’ll reply when he’s ready, so be patient.
Take it easy, send a text and maybe a meme along with it:
Wanted to know what this special guy has been up to, but it’s been 84 years
…since you replied.😜
8. Let’s transmit GOOD VIBES ONLY while texting
Remember this, guys don’t like drama in their life, so to keep up with his rhythm of texting try to be precise and do not overload him with unnecessary information.
- He would like to hear how your day went but try to keep it short, positive, and simple. Do not include details of how you hate your colleague or what your boss did to you.
It is okay to inform him about your daily struggles but keep it fun and easy. You know, if you keep complaining to him over text, over and over, he would not know what to reply to anymore.
9. Take your turn and end that conversation on occasion
If you want to keep the texting game going, another thing that you should learn is how to end the conversation.
Knowing how to end the conversation is just as important as knowing how to initiate it. If he has been the one that has ended the last three or four conversations that made you immediately the one that has to write first, AGAIN.
How to do it? End it with a positive comment on something that he was saying, compliment him and let him know that now you need to do something else.
Example: Wow, that’s thoughtful of you! I really needed some music while working… which I have to continue, haha. Talk to you tomorrow, good night!
See? You did not comment on whether you liked that song or not. This will keep a grip on him since he will write to you to ask whether you liked the song that he sent or not.
10. Add abbreviations to jazz up the conversation
Many of us like to use abbreviations while texting since it is easier to text that way.
But still, you should know which ones (abbreviations) to use since if you use the wrong ones it will make you look like a schoolgirl.
Here, a small list of what you can use:
- LOL-Laughing out Loud
- ATM -At the moment
- YOLO- You Only Live Once
Example: Come on, let’s go sky diving this weekend since I have been dreaming of it for so long. You know, YOLO!
Still, avoid using abbreviations that you don’t know since they may be risky and lead to misunderstandings.
11. Ask for his opinion or advice once in a while
Another thing that keeps the text conversation interesting is making the guy feel special.
Ask for his opinion when needed, or if you need his advice and to guide you for something, do it. It will make him feel special and keep the text conversation going.
For example, if your car broke down today, ask his opinion on what to do about it. This will keep him interested and go on with your conversation.
If you have been talking for a while with this guy and you feel comfortable with him or now he is your boyfriend, text him to ask his advice! You might ask his advice for any decision that you want to make in life when you need help to sort your thoughts.
This tip will help in evolving your conversation and relationship, it will keep you passing the imaginary ball to one another for some time.
12. Do not just sit there and wait for him to reply
When you text him and he does not reply immediately do not sit there and wait for his reply, nor text him everyday checking if he’s got your messages.
Instead, use the RADIO SILENCE technique; It can be used also while texting with a guy. It can help you focus on yourself and reflect on your texting habits.
Keep your silence and calm, that way you will give him space to take his time and reply.
If he doesn’t reply for days, then keep your distance until he replies and focus on what needs to be changed in your texting method.
Last but not least at all, flirting with him through text is another way to keep your text conversation interesting and, more importantly, to keep your guy interested in it.
If flirting is something you’re good at, use it! Send him flirty texts, see if he’s into it. If he is, it’ll keep your texting interesting, sexy, and fresh. It’ll make room for the conversation to flow naturally with chemistry and tension. Lovely!
DIFFERENT SCENARIOS! Pick your text message and adjust it to your situation.
1. After texting with him for months you might feel that it is time to shift the texting to a date. Send him something like these:
- I have heard that the cinema is pretty amazing and I have also been there once. But I would like to visit it again, anytime soon 🙂
- “So, I have an extra ticket for [movie name]. If you feel like seeing it at the [cinema name] this Friday, you can totally come with me!”
2. When you want to keep a long-distance relationship and want to keep him interested:
- *send a photo* I am hugging this teddy bear right now, but I wish it was you…
- Let’s play a game right now. You guess what I am thinking and if you guess right, you get something special 😉
- Tonight me and you, 8 pm. Facetime Party. Only you are invited!!!
3. You have had your first date, it went well, and want to keep him interested to have a second, third, and endless dates: Here is what to text after the first date to keep him more interested in you:
- It was so nice to see you, it was fun! Let’s try it again soon.
- I think you’re absolutely wrong about [movie name]. I just watched it, and I do have a lot to say about it!
- I’m very happy that I got to spend time with you. Thank you for the amazing time!
Do I need to follow the same guidelines using online dating apps?
I know that you want to know how to keep a guy interested online. Here we go!
Since we are a part of this digital era, any platform uses texting, in a way or another, as a form of online dating. Whether that platform is Bumble, Instagram, Tinder, Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp; texting is one of the main ingredients.
Text him short texts, not just like ’Hi’ or ‘Hey’ but something like: ‘Lovely profile pic’, ‘Cute cat on the profile pic, is that yours?’. If you get to know him better, you start to apply flirty and funny phrases or texts.
In the end, know how to balance your reply time and most importantly be authentic while you text.
Conclusion – Have you got the idea of how to get him interested over text?
Actually, it is not THAT COMPLICATED. It is not an unsolved Jigsaw.
After tackling and elaborating all those tips, girl ‘His Interest’ will be yours. OMG, I almost forgot to add: Be originally interesting and that will reflect on the way you text; for sure!
Good luck, and good skills on your texting ladies!