Texting ‘I love you” is a milestone in any relationship, whether it is a crush, a new relationship, or a boyfriend.
It is not just the words that matter, but also the timing and context when those words are said.
And while it is undoubtedly nice to hear those words, he might not sincerely mean it when he texts that.
Let’s get into what it means and see if he actually loves you or if is it simply a manipulative tactic.
1. Did he say it out of the blue or he had it coming?
Say you have been on a few dates and the connection is really strong, almost enough for him to express his feelings to you.
He couldn’t keep it to himself anymore and felt a big desire to express his affection for you, and felt it is important for his significant other to know his affection.
He may have felt a genuine need to tell you!
2. He wants to remind you how much you mean to him
For some, it is a big word boys don’t typically say if they don’t mean it.
He wants to remind you are loved and cared for, and to him texting “I love you” is no less meaningful than saying it in person.
For him, it was the perfect timing to tell you he was falling in love with you.
3. He understood you are the one for him
He constantly mentions how happy he is with you and always includes you in his plans.
It is a sign he is happy and is head over heels for you, enough to wanna build a serious relationship.
And therefore he takes the next step by typing those “I LOVE YOU” letters.
4. He is more comfortable saying it online first rather than in person
If it is too early, then it happens because he wanted to test the waters first.
Usually, a shy, insecure, and scared guy will keep the possibility of rejection at a very safe level until he feels confident their feelings are being reciprocated.
Especially if it is something as big as saying “I love you”, he fears how you will react and may hesitate to send such a message.
Perhaps texting “ I love you” is the only way he feels comfortable expressing his feelings.
Till the time comes when he feels comfortable enough to say it out loud to your face, he may prefer to express his feelings through texting.
5. He wants to get in your pants faster
Love bombing is the tactic he uses to get what he wants, which is usually sex.
So he speeds the process, by using charming words.
But those three words (I love you) are often just a lie to cover up the actual intentions he has, which is to use you for sex.
6. He wants to get your attention by saying what you wanna hear
All along his true intentions are to have some temporary fun while still keeping other options open with other girls.
The magic of the words plays a major role even when texting.
He will know just what to say at the correct times, he uses his texting skills, does the research, and is there when you are most approachable.
7. He thinks that is the only way to get you
He may not know better otherwise he would act better.
In his mind, he thinks “saying I love you” is the only thing every girl wants and all it takes to win you over.
Without considering how long you’ve known each other and the depth of the connection you have.
Even if deep down he knows there is no genuine “love” between you, he doesn’t care as long as it benefits him and the game he plays.
8. You got into an argument and he thinks that is how you will forgive him
This is the case of a boyfriend and a person you have been dating for a few months.
You had a steamy argument and he is scared he might have lost you forever.
So saying “I LOVE YOU,” is how he apologizes and soothes his way into getting back into your life.
Is the “I love you” sincere?
If you want to understand if he really meant what he said, you should probably calculate the days you have known him for.
The length of your relationship can provide a valuable context to help you understand the sincerity of his words.
Talking to a licensed relationship coach or therapist can be a great source of help when it comes to figuring out the right thing to say about any doubts you have.
A great address for that is Relationship Hero, which provides insight and help for each individual.
Ways to respond when a guy texts “I Love you”.
The ways how you respond to his texts depend on several factors, including how you feel and your relationship with him.
Whether he is someone you just met and you don’t sense the connection you will respond differently.
Whereas it will be different with a boy you’ve been dating and having a fun time along the way.
1. Suggest talking to him in person
If it bothers you then bring it up and talk it through, it is better than just assuming and getting in your head.
You always notice he says I love you through text but not so much or ever in real life.
So, try and arrange a meetup, make him comfortable enough to wanna talk about it, maybe he is just the shy type!
2. Call him and express your feelings
If texting isn’t enough and you wanna express what you feel on a more intimate level, then maybe try giving him a call.
It will allow both to share what he is feeling without texting and creating any misunderstandings.
If you are not one for words, calling is a good way for some serious “I love you” text.
3. You don’t have to say it back just to be nice
Start by acknowledging his feelings for you, however, you have to make it clear the feeling is not mutual.
A simple: Im sorry I can’t say that I feel the same way or I enjoy spending time with you but I’m not just interested in that.
You can explain that you don’t feel the same and that you are sorry for leading them on.
4.“I Need more time to say it back”
If you are not ready to say it back, it won’t be a problem if your partner is an understanding individual.
But naturally, anyone would be a little thrown off by this response, however, he should know your feelings matter and he should appreciate them.
Just reassure him that you stand in the same place but need a little bit more time.
Conclusion
When it comes to determining if a guy loves you, it’s important to trust your instincts and listen to your gut feelings.
It’s also essential, to be honest and open with your partner about your own feelings, and to not shy away from difficult conversations, especially if you have any doubts.
These conversations can be uncomfortable, but they are important to have to address any concerns or uncertainties you may have.
And by discussing your feelings openly and honestly. you can strengthen your bond with your partner and build a stronger relationship
Best wishes,
Callisto Adams
Leave a Reply