What a guy thinks and feels after you sleep with him depends on his preferences, sex performance, and how he feels about you.
Right after you have slept with him, he might be going through a range of emotions.
He might be confused, excited, reminiscing, or just numb.
To get a better picture of what he thinks after you sleep with him, here are 11 general/possible thoughts:
1. He might be thinking to recreate this experience
If he enjoyed it then he will be thinking how long it will be until you meet again and recreate the exact moment that you had.
At this moment, he might be thinking of ways to attract you more and how can he convince you to do this all over again.
- He might think of romantic dates and doing something he has never done.
- He might think of spending more time with you and getting to know you better.
- He does this because he wants to know your preferences so he can relive this moment once again.
Hence, be careful. Not all men that think this want something serious with you.
He might not want to date you exclusively but does all this to feel good for himself.
2. He might be thinking of taking a break
If he reflects on the physical and emotional level then he might think that he needs a break from this relationship for a while.
I thought that men have a high sexual desire and they would like to do it anywhere and anytime.
But no. There is something even deeper that lies behind a man’s emotions and feelings and thoughts after sex.
The medical doctor from Seattle, Marc DiJulio explains this in more detail.
- He says that if there is no emotional connection in a relationship then the desire and all the flame starts to decrease.
- When there is no real connection then sex dies and he might think to disappear.
- He might even become depressed and won’t know how to explain his feelings, thoughts, and desires.
To get a glimpse of all this matter, the author Sarah Hunter Murrey explains it better in her book “Not Always in the Mood: The new science of Men, Sex, and Relationships”.
3. He might evaluate attraction and chemistry
He might reflect on what he has gone through during those few seconds.
Well, a guy who feels more and is oriented to understand his feelings, will take a step back and reflect.
- He might evaluate all that happened and if it’s worth continuing.
- Especially if you had a one-night stand then he will go through every detail to understand if he can move forward with you.
- He might check how long it lasted. What you said. How he felt and so on.
If you have a similar experience then I would recommend you to talk and connect with a relationship coach.
They will help you to understand an alpha, beta, or even gama male and how they think after sex according to your experience.
4. He might go through some feelings of sadness or nostalgia
If a guy is recently out of a long-term relationship, he might find it difficult to feel a lot during sex.
Because he isn’t healed yet and hasn’t moved on and that prevents him to feel deep emotions or enjoy the moment.
You might be his rebound relationship and as soon as he has sex with you, he might have flashbacks.
- After you sleep with him, he might think about the way his ex would make him feel during sex.
- He might also think that this isn’t as enjoyable as he thought it would be or as it was with his ex.
And I advise you to reflect on this “relationship” as soon as you can.
A few years ago I went through the same experience. I dated a guy that never cared how he would make me feel during sex because he was only thinking of how to get over his ex.
Even the dating coach Mathew Hussey agrees on this matter and advises you to reflect on this matter but to own it at the same time.
Because if you state that you fear that you slept too early with him then he would gradually lose respect for you.
5. He reflects on his decision and intentions regarding you
What does he think after you sleep with him? Well, he might be pondering his decision to upgrade your relationship.
Sex is not always the worst decision while dating and won’t always make the guy lose feelings for you.
It is a great way of connecting emotionally and reflecting on whether you want to spend the rest of your life with this person.
- He might think that he is attracted to you and feels connected to you. You care about him and this is all he needs to be with a person in a relationship.
- Also, if he enjoyed sex and you have been dating for a while, he might think to not keep his dating options open anymore.
It depends on the guy but sometimes a good and fire sex will give him the needed answer.
6. He wants to get to know you more
If you ignited a spark in him and were authentic then he might be thinking of getting to know you better.
A guy that liked you then he might be thinking of continuing this thing and maybe he isn’t ready to commit but he wants to see when things are going.
- He might text and call you after this hot steam night.
- He might send you flowers or even flirt with you through text or phone.
- He might show up at a cafe you go to or at your house or work.
What he does depends on his personality and how he can express his feelings.
7. He might be trying not to include feelings in this matter
If he was hurt in the past relationships then he might go through some trauma even after sleeping with you.
And if he is reminiscing and going through some old feelings, he might feel numb after sleeping with you.
- His mind right now would be a mess. He would go through some mixed-up feelings.
- He might feel sad, happy, unimportant, and important at the same time.
- He might start to like you and trust you but old trauma triggers his fears of trusting and loving.
And in this situation, he might be silent after the sex and you might see that he is just overthinking everything.
8. He’s wondering what is going on in your mind too
Let’s jump into another perspective. A guy thinks that you might not like him too or that you might or might have not enjoyed it after you sleep with him.
Well, if he thinks what you’re thinking after having sex there are two explanations.
1. One: He cares about you and how he made you feel.
2. Two: He has an anxious attachment style and is always in a fight or flight mode and is afraid that he was not good enough.
You might make the difference between these two if you reflect on what you talked about after you slept with him.
Was he anxious and talking or bragging about how could he was or could be?
Or if he asks you if there’s something that could be changed and if you felt comfortable then he might be asking just because he cares.
9. He might be experiencing the post-coital gleam
Yes, post-coital gleam is a thing after sex and even men go through it.
You’ll notice that he’s feeling out of this world and is super excited and funny.
It is like a booster of energy and ego.
- He will immediately text you in the morning and ask you to meet him.
- He will feel super relaxed and ask you to join him and experience it too. He might hug you or kiss you.
- He might make plans for the future and what you want to do right after having sex.
Yet, note that not all partners act the same.
Some can connect easily to their feelings and emotions during sex and some find it more difficult.
10. He might be thinking of being more vulnerable with you
Pillow talk isn’t something that every couple or someone who is hooking up or dating would go through.
Yet, if he wants to connect with you on a deeper level, he will use sex as a way to be more vulnerable with you.
- Now you’ll notice that he will ask you how you’re feeling and if there’s something he could do.
- Also, his questions might be related to your future or even he might reflect on his past.
- He might use his humor and tease you a bit about this experience or just in general.
Him: You know that this was the moment that I felt most alive in my life and I would not trade it for anything.
You: but, why?
Him: Because you made me feel like the one man who is in ecstasy and wouldn’t care about anything else in this world. You were caring, loving, and understanding.
11. He might be thinking of why he did it
The feeling of regret might come right after sex. He might have not been ready to do it or he might not have enjoyed it.
There are a billion reasons why he isn’t content with this experience.
His values might not have been met with you during sex and now he wishes that it would be better if this didn’t happen.
Yet not every male feels and thinks his way.
- A man that is more of old values and views sex as something sacred then he might be remorseful because his needs and values weren’t met.
- On the other hand, he might be remorseful as soon as he notices that you might ask him to date exclusively after sex.
- He might be afraid of commitment and now thinks that there is no way out and might even ghost you.
Do men think less of women who sleep with them on the first date?
If a man thinks less of the woman who sleeps with him on the first date depends on his personal belief and experience.
If he liked her and had great sex, he will think of her.
He might want to know more about her before developing more feelings.
Even if he doesn’t like to get laid down on the first date then he might or might not be judgmental of her choice.
So this depends on his preferences and mindset. He might look at it as a brave move or as something unpleasant.
Because he might think that she’s not looking for a serious relationship and is just messing around.
What do guys feel after sex? Do they lose feelings for the girl?
Feelings can be diverse and even a guy after having sex can have different emotions.
Starting from feeling needed, hot, happy, and heated to feeling blue, confused, and not content at all.
Satisfaction and contentment are not always the first feelings that a man feels right after sex.
- He might lose feelings for the girl if he isn’t content with sex.
- He might lose feelings for her right after sex if his personal beliefs weren’t met during sex. He thought something else and experienced something else.
- If he might not have felt the emotional connection during sex then his feelings might start to change.
- If he’s having sex with other people at the same time and is exploring new experiences, he might start to lose feelings.
Because he is balancing and finding out who matches best his needs and his focus might be on someone else.
- If he loves booty calls and is a player then he might not involve his feelings from the beginning and
A guy that isn’t chasing a serious relationship won’t view sex the same way as you do.
This is what the dating coach Elliot Scott also explains through his experience in a hookup there aren’t a lot of deep feelings involved.
It is all about the short thrill that comes with sleeping with someone and nothing more.
It’s not the same for all men. Someone who likes you and is dating to marry might sleep with you to connect deeply. It depends on his personality and preferences.
In this matter nothing is absolute. Everything is relative!
Closing the curtains!
After you sleep with him, he will think a lot of things such as “Was I good, did she enjoy, I don’t feel the same about her or What am I going to do”.
There is a lot going into his mind and head. What he thinks is based on his personality, attachment style, your relationship, and how he views sex.
I am saying this because one cannot know what goes on in someone’s mind after this experience. After all, everyone deals with it uniquely.
Thus, if he has an anxious attachment style he will probably think how he did and if you liked him or if you’re going to like him.
On the other hand, if he has a secure attachment style, he will not rumble too much about the experience and will let himself enjoy the moment.