Feeling down at times is a normal part of human nature, but even so, it pains us to see people we love feel unhappy.
When a partner’s spirits are down, our first instinct is to want to make that negative feeling go away.
So we look for ways to help us with our goal!
If your boyfriend has been feeling down lately, and you want to cheer him up, I got your back!
Here are tips and messages that will help cheer your boyfriend up.
1. Make plans to spend time together.
Spending time with the person he loves is just what he needs!
Make plans to spend more time together so that you can be in each other’s presence:
- Plan a fun date for you two;
- Call his phone and talk to each other;
- Arrange a video call so that you two can see each other;
- Go out to eat in his favorite restaurant;
- Take part in his favorite pastime with him (e.g. video games, sports, movies, etc).
A study on the link between spending time with others and well-being shows that people’s well-being improves when in the presence of a person they like, for example, a family member, friend, or partner.
By initiating more quality time together, you’re creating a space in which he’s more prone to feeling happy.
And it makes sense!
Whenever we’re sad, we always seek the people we love for comfort, they’re the only ones who cheer us up.
And the same happens the other way around; your boyfriend will be comforted by your presence, quality time, and effort.
2. Encourage but don’t force him to talk about what’s bothering him.
Opening up does wonders for a person’s well-being. It’s a healthy way of dealing with your feelings.
The feeling of being heard, seen, and understood brings joy and comfort to our life.
Send him a text that encourages him to open up about what’s going on in his life:
1. “I’m always here for you if you want to talk about what’s been going on, my love.”
2. “Is there something bothering you? I’m here for you.”
3. “What’s been on your mind, baby? Do you want to talk about it? I’m here for you regardless.”
4. “I know things are hard right now. I’m here for you, no matter what.”
5. “Whenever you feel ready to talk about what’s going on, I’m here to listen, baby.”
6. “How have things been? If you ever want to talk about things, I’m here for you.”
7. “What’s on your mind, my love? I’m here if you ever want to express yourself.”
Show him that opening up might help him in his journey and that you wouldn’t judge him for feeling these emotions.
Show readiness and willingness to hear him out whenever and if he feels ready.
Be cautious to not sound pushy or frustrated as this will push him further away and make his mood worse.
Knowing that he’s cared for in this way and that he has a shoulder he can lean on will cheer him up.
If he decides to open up, that in itself can greatly improve his mood.
3. Listen and show empathy to what he says.
At times, all we need is someone to listen to us talk and pour our hearts out.
In general, men aren’t encouraged to talk as much as women are; they think that people don’t care about what they have to say.
This is not true, and it’s up to you to show him that.
Be attentive and empathetic whenever he decides to open up about his struggles and private matters.
Listen to him talk and do most of the listening.
Don’t immediately offer a solution as this might come off as insensitive and dismissive.
Instead, occasionally chime in with words of empathy, such as:
– “I’m sorry you are going through this.”
– “Thank you for sharing this with me.”
– “How did that make you feel?”
– “I can see how that would make you feel upset.”
– “I understand where you’re coming from. That makes sense.”
– “You’re right. I would have felt the same way.”
– “That sounds so frustrating.”
– “I don’t blame you one bit. That’s understandable.”
– “I’m on your side.”
Whenever somebody opens up, out of respect, keep remarks short and empathetic to not interrupt them.
Feeling supported, heard, and understood will help him feel better.
4. Lift him up with heartening words.
Give him hope, confidence, and strength.
Show him that he’s an amazing and strong person for doing the things that he does and that no one can take that away from him.
Unhappiness is the kind of feeling that takes a toll on one’s confidence and overall self-image.
It heavily affects oneself negatively.
Words of encouragement will help lift him up and show him that he’s being too hard on himself: knowing that you see him in a positive light will cheer him up.
– “You’re a very strong person for doing what you do, baby. You got this!”
– “You make me so proud. You’re the strongest, kindest, most skilled person I know, and never forget that.”
– “You’re the most incredible person I know, no one and nothing will ever change that. You’re stronger than any obstacle.”
– “You always inspire me to be the best version of myself. You’re kind, responsible, and an amazing person.”
– “You’ve helped me get through the hardest times. You’re that type of selfless person who always gives his all. You deserve to be happy, my love!”
– “You always give it your all, and you make me so proud. You’re a wonderful person with endless possibilities.”
–“You’re the strongest person I know, and ever since I met you, you’ve had such a positive influence on me. Gosh, I’m so grateful!”
– “No matter what or how hard things get, it will never take away from how great you are. You’re an incredible guy and I’m so happy I met you.”
– “Whenever I feel upset, the thought of you alone cheers me up. You’re nice, kind, loving, intelligent, and so perfect! I love you.”
– “I love everything about you. You’re a wonderful and delightful person who’s an inspiration to everyone around him.”
Don’t shy away from telling him how great of a person he is and how much you appreciate him.
List all the things you love and respect about him; they’re going to cheer him up and improve his self-regard.
5. Ask if there’s anything you can do to help.
You can always ask him if there’s anything you can do to help with his situation or cheer him up.
People may sometimes feel reluctant to ask for help, and this might be the case with your boyfriend as well.
He might be hesitating to ask for your help because he believes he might inconvenience you in some way.
That’s why it’s important to take the initiative and tell him that you care and you’re willing to help.
You can try saying something like this:
– “I’m always here for you. I care about you and I want to help you in any way I can.”
– “Is there anything I can do to help you? You know I don’t mind as long as you’re happy.”
– “This is a difficult time for you, and I want to help you in any way I can. Is there something that comes to mind?”
– “I’m sorry you’re going through this, baby. Is there anything I can do to help take your mind off of things?”
– “Thank you for sharing this with me, it must be hard. Please, if there’s anything I can do to help, don’t hesitate to tell me.”
– “I wish I could take your pain away. If there’s any way I can help, you should tell me!”
– “If there’s anything I can do, don’t hesitate to tell me. You’ve always been here for me when I needed you the most too.”
Social Psychologist Xuan Zhao, Ph.D., says that people find asking for help hard, even though others are more than willing to make a difference in people’s lives.
In this case, people usually feel uneasy asking for help as they believe they are potentially bothering the other person.
Show your boyfriend that his request for help would never bother you and there’s no reason for him to hesitate: you only want what’s best for him.
Your support and love will undoubtedly brighten his mood!
6. Show interest in him by asking questions.
Ask him questions and show interest in him and his life.
Give your boyfriend a chance to talk about himself by asking different questions regarding:
- How his day went;
- Updates on recent events;
- His opinion on different things and topics;
- His hobbies and pastimes;
- His favorite things (e.g. food, holiday, place, movie, etc);
- His goals and dreams.
Basically, anything that encourages him to talk about himself and that shows your care and interest in him.
Be cautious with the frequency and sensitivity of the questions, though! We don’t want to make it sound like he’s being investigated.
Otherwise, he’s going to feel good and appreciate the fact that you’re taking an interest in his life.
7. Send him selfies and voice messages!
If there’s one thing that can cheer people up, it’s the person they love!
Sending selfies and voice memos is a cute—and effective way—to cheer your man up.
Hearing your voice and seeing you will cheer him up and encourage him to take each day as it comes; he will get a sudden burst of motivation!
You’re his favorite person and don’t forget it.
Consider sending him pictures of yourself, the places you go to, the new outfits you get, or interesting things you see!
Don’t shy away from voice memos either! Chances are that he misses your voice and hearing it would make his day.
When you love somebody, you start appreciating every part of them.
Everything they do and say will bring a smile to your face.
8. Send memes and tell jokes—in other words, use humor!
Laughing helps relieve stress and it improves a person’s mood.
If your boyfriend has been feeling upset lately, chances are that making him laugh will help cheer him up, even if just a little bit!
You can try:
- Sending him funny memes;
- Sending him funny videos that you know he would get a kick out of;
- Cracking jokes;
- Sharing funny stories with him;
- Watching a funny movie together;
- Send him pictures when something funny happens.
Bring a smile to his face while also showing that you’re constantly thinking about him and looking for ways to cheer him up.
It’s no surprise that laughter is the best medicine!
It’s part of our nature: we gravitate towards positive people and things that make us feel positive.
Looking at funny stuff to cheer us up always does the trick!
Make your boyfriend laugh by using the kind of humor that you know will get him good.
Chances are that a good laugh was just what he needed.
9. Tell him that you love him and be affectionate.
Don’t shy away from opportunities to tell your man how much you love and appreciate him.
Send him a cute text message that shows him how loved and treasured he is.
– “I love you. I wish I was there to hug you right now.”
– “You’re my favorite person. I love everything about you.❤️”
– “I love you so much, baby. No matter what, I’ll always be here for you.”
– “Every time we’re in each other’s presence, I fall more and more in love with you. You’re the best boyfriend in the world.🥰”
– “How can someone as perfect as you exist? You’re the actual definition of ‘the whole package’. I love you so much.”
– “You have the power to instantly make my whole day just by being present. The thought of you alone makes me happy. I love you, baby.”
– “You’re the most amazing person I know and a joy to be around. I love you so much.”
– “If perfection doesn’t exist, then how come I’m talking to you?😚”
– “I love you so much You’re an amazing human being and everything I could ask for—and more.”
– “I’m so thankful for you being in my life. You’re wonderful in every way possible and I love you.”
– “You make the world a better place. I love you so much I don’t know how I could put it in words.”
– “I appreciate you being the wonderful human being that you are. I love you so much and I wish I was there right now.❤️”
Compliment him and tell him how grateful you are for him.
Your words mean a lot to him and will help him in a time of need; he’s going to be delighted to know that person whom he loves dearly, loves him too.
Being affectionate will undoubtedly aid his journey to happiness.
10. Be there for him when he needs you.
I’m sure that this goes without saying, but yes! Being there definitely makes a huge difference for the other person.
When a person is going through stuff, the best thing to do is simply be there for them.
Listen to him, even through text.
Be patient and don’t rush or force him to do anything they don’t feel like doing.
Whatever your boyfriend is going through, there’s one thing we know for sure: it’s serious and it deserves to be treated as such.
He’s dealing with private matters on his own, and he needs your full support and attention!
- Tell him that you’re there for him;
- Don’t get impatient about the way that he’s feeling;
- Don’t rush him to do anything;
- Do not give up on him;
- Be there when he wants/needs to express himself;
- Spend quality time together.
Show him with your actions that you haven’t given up on him and he’s worth it.
Knowing that you’re there and giving effort will cheer him up and make him thankful.
Take his love language into consideration!
According to Gary Chapman, there are 5 ways people express and receive affection:
1. Words of affirmation: People with this love language appreciate affectionate words the most, (e.g. “I love you”, compliments, encouraging words, appreciation words, frequent talks, etc).
2. Quality time: People whose love language is quality time feel love the most when their partner spends time with them: giving their time and attention.
3. Acts of service: People with this type of love language believe that actions speak louder than words.
They appreciate it when their partner gives them a helping hand, does them a favor, and generally goes out of their way to make their life easier.
4. Gifts: People whose love language is gifts, well, they enjoy giving and receiving gifts!
They appreciate a thoughtful gift. They value a meaningful gift and the thought that went behind picking it!
5. Physical touch: Physical intimacy gives people with this love language affirmation and connection.
They feel the most loved with physical contact (kisses, hugs, cuddles, etc).
What is your boyfriend’s love language?
Based on it, you can get a better idea of what would make him feel loved and happy.
Do consider his love language to cheer him up and improve his mood!
At the end of the day…
Love can be a language that needs translation.
When we love somebody, we feel their pain as well and would do anything to make it go away.
There are ways you can make somebody happier, however, it’s important to pick the appropriate way and time.
Your efforts won’t be in vain!
Sincerely,
Callisto.
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