A mind-blowing date, or an absolutely horrible date? Perhaps somewhere in between those two?
Whatever the situation, texting after a first date seems like one of the difficult tasks to get done. Margret, you’ve been through so many things, how can you get stuck in the middle of the process of crafting a text message?
We’ve all been Margret at some point. It’s understandable. I carefully crafted 20 unique and useful text messages you can get inspired by, or just copy them and not give me the credits (seriously, no).
You want to get back to that normal communication after the first date or want to keep it extra all the way, we got examples!
BUT, before we get to the text examples, let’s see what are some things you can consider before or while crafting your own perfect text after that amazing/horrible/average/mindblowing date you had with the person:
Useful tips: How & when to text after a first date?
When to text after a first date?
What a wonderful question! First off, forget the ‘waiting’ rules. Text them whenever you feel like texting them. Whether it is to thank them for the time they shared with you, for a second date, or to simply let them know you didn’t enjoy the date as much.
Don’t be too late though. I’d recommend you text them within a day, to let them know where you’re standing. Some good tips and advice on what to do on a first date for the ladies.
If you want this to be real, keep the games away, won’t ya?
Again, don’t play waiting games, or any games really, of course, if you want the real deal. A game will work for some time, but it’ll require constant ‘playing’ in order for your connection to work.
If you want real, then keep it that way. Text them whenever you feel like texting them.
Text them even if your date went not so good
You want to be straight and forward, especially about your intentions. If you didn’t like the date, if you wouldn’t want to have another date with that person, don’t leave them hanging, tell them.
Be thankful, not overwhelming
Thankful for the time, thankful for the presence, thankful for the good time, just plainly purely thankful is enough. You don’t want to be overwhelming and go out of your way to shower them with compliments just to impress them.
If you had a good time, let them know you did so. Don’t overcomplicate it with ‘I’ve never had a better date than this ever’ if you had a better date than this.
Keep the nude pictures to yourself, at least for now
Unless both of your energies are going that way, the nude pictures after a first date are not the best thing you can do if you feel like having a second date.
If you’re stuck and your brain blanked while trying to start a text:
- Ask them if they arrived safely
- Share something you tried that they told you they’re into (e.g music, films, etc)
- Don’t put the focus entirely on their appearance
- Thank them for the good time
- Let it be known through the text whether you’d do another date or not
Now that we’ve tackled when should you text after a first date, and what would be appropriate/inappropriate, we’re ready for the ‘after first date’ texts; Here they are, all 21 of them:
Texts you can send after a first date; If the date went mind blowingly well
If your date went mind blowingly well, or somewhere around there, then congratulations! Dating the right person is easy, it might need a little push to start the engine, especially if you’re mind blown by them and don’t know what to say after the first date.
Here are some texts you can get inspired by, or copy them if you’re really that blocked and can’t think of something original:
1. “Hi. Just checking in… Did you make it home safe?”
Whether you’re a man or a woman; a guy or a girl; you can send this to your date if what you’re looking to send is something sweet and simple to show your date that you’re thinking of them.
2. “I hope you enjoyed tonight as much as I did. I’d love to go out with you again soon.”
This one will leave the room and get you ready for a second date. Also, it is a ‘faster’ way of knowing if they feel the same about the date as you.
3. “Listen, I think you’re wrong about [movie name]. I just watched it, and it blew my mind. How about we meet next week and I tell you exactly why? Oh, and count it as a date, please.”
This is one of those flirty texts you can send them if flirty is your vibe and energy. You’re kind of confronting them but in a sweet way, and even sweeter, using that as an ‘excuse’ to see them next week. Cheers!
4. “I heard [name of song] like you told me to. And, oh man, I’ve got so much to say!”
If you’re just looking to start a normal conversation, and keep it going like that for a while, this’d make the perfect text for that. You can use a movie, food, or whatever your date told you to try.
5. “You’re smart, you’re good-looking [replace with handsome/pretty depending on gender], what’s the catch? I want to know, hence I’m inviting you to a fun activity this Saturday. Don’t insist on knowing what it is, it’s a surprise!”
You’re being playful, funny, and flirty in one text. They’ll want to know what’s the surprise. If you want a second date with them, this text will get you one if they’re slightly interested in you. The rest is up to you!
6. “I didn’t think it’d be that easy and lovely being around you. Thank you for the amazing time!”
It’ll poke their imagination a little, and might make them curious enough to ask you what you initially thought of them. Also, you’re being polite by thanking them, leaving room for them to reflect and see if they feel the same way about this.
7. “After thinking about it, I decided: I’m taking the risk! I’ll teach you [activity/thing] haha. Sunday, 5 pm? (it’s a date btw)”
This is one of those funny texts you can send your date; you’re gently making fun of them, to an extent which is sweet, and giving them a time when you’re free to meet up with them. This is your funny, straight and forward text, if that’s what you’re going for.
8. “You seemed even more interesting than I thought you would. I’ve got so much to learn from you!”
You’ll make them curious by showing them YOU’RE curious. Letting them know about how their personality impressed you is one of the ways to go!
9. “You have a funny, yet unique way of seeing things. I genuinely like being around you.”
Another one of those flirty texts. It’s not your ‘hardcore’ flirty text, it is rather gentle and sweet. Remember, you don’t want to overdo thoughts, opinions and come off as overwhelming.
10. “I like you, and I enjoyed your company very much. How about we meet up again soon?”
This is plainly straightforward, it is short, and straight to the point. Also, the other person on the receiving end will have an easier time letting you know whether they’re into you or not, and you’ll know it too based on their answer to your question. List of Questions to ask a guy in person or over text.
11. “It was amazing to see you in person, you’re lovely. I’d like to see you again soon.”
Sweet, short, simple, straight to the point. If they roll that way, this’ll get you a second date. Simple as that.
12. “Hi. I really enjoyed the date, and I’d absolutely love to see you again sometime.”
Doesn’t matter when you send this text. If they enjoyed the date like you did, they’ll respond positively to this text. If this is something you’d normally say to someone, feel free to send this to your date.
13. “Wanted to text you earlier, ran out of ideas, and here’s me taking the risk: Would love to see you again sometime!”
Aha! Another one of the funny texts you can send after your first amazing date. You’re being honest, sweet, funny, and making a point here. If you find yourself in this text, then send it. If it doesn’t represent any parts of your personality, then don’t’.
14. “I’m so glad that I got to spend time with you. I had a wonderful time, thank you.”
It’s just a simple example of how you send a thank you text after a first date. It is simple, and if you’re both into starting a conversation, you can make it work through this text.
If the date went not the best it could go – What to text them if you don’t want a second date?
The date not going so well is a tricky situation to be in. Some just leave it there at the date and choose the easy way out: ghosting; and some choose to let the person know. If you’d prefer the latter then I’ve got 7 examples for you:
1. “Thank you so much for sharing your time with me. I think it’s only fair to be straightforward and tell you that I don’t see us as a good fit together. Again, thank you, and good luck!”
2. “I liked spending time with you, I just don’t see us being more than friends. Thank you for the laughs and smiles. All the best!”
3. “You really seemed like a genuine person, though I don’t think we’re a good fit for one another to keep dating. Thank you for the good time.”
4. “It was nice meeting you, though I’m not down for a second date. I thought it’s only fair if I’m honest and open about this. Thanks, and good luck!”
5. “I just wanted to thank you for being so nice and warm yesterday. I really did enjoy the time with you, but I didn’t see we’re compatible on a few ideas that are very important to me. Best of luck!”
6. “You’re such a lovely person, hence I want to be honest and tell you that I’m looking for something else, and I cannot offer you what you’re looking for. Thank you. Wish you light and joy!”
7. “Hi. I’m going to be honest and tell you that I liked the time we shared, but I don’t really see us continuing this. Thank you, and all the best!”
Text after first date, then nothing – What is actually going on here?
This is a pretty common situation in which a lot of people find themselves to be ‘stuck’ in, or confused by. You have a feeling the date went well, you get a text from them after the date, and then nothing.
We can never know for sure what actually went on, but there are a few common reasons that people do this (texting after the first date, and then going silent):
It happens for someone that’s not interested to see you again, to text you after a first date. What could have confused you, could be their text.
If they just thanked you, and didn’t mention anything about another date then probably that was their way of telling you they’re leaving things at that.
Another way to this could be that they either don’t know how to tell you they’re not interested, or they simply won’t bother to tell you that. It’s harsh, I know, but it is also true a lot of times.
2. They might have been in a good mood then, but not feeling it that much now.
This is pretty common in the dating world. It could be drinks, or simply a good mood from a good hormonal balance in the brain that day. Next, they change their mind due to their mood dropping, and feeling like the date wasn’t really what they thought it was at the time.
3. Someone else got/got back into the picture.
This could be very likely especially if you met through dating apps, or online. This is a person that’s putting themselves out there, trying to get into the dating world through the internet.
They’re meeting people, and they probably met someone after they met you, hence they’re moving that other ‘case’ forward.
Another scenario could be that someone got back into their lives, it could be an ex, or just someone they were very involved with.
4. You weren’t reciprocating when they texted you.
… And now they’re not knowing how to start, or whether they should start a conversation. If you were cold and not giving them signals that you’re interested, then you might take the chance and text them, instead of waiting for another text from them.
On the other hand, if you were reciprocating, caring, and nice when they texted you, then this might not be the reason for their silence.
5. They’re playing some sort of game to ‘keep you wondering’.
If it hasn’t been too long since the time that they texted you it could be that they’re playing a sort of game to keep you wondering about them, and have you in their ‘hook’.
A lot of online ‘experts’ suggest this to people, as a way for those people to stay mysterious, interesting, ‘high value’, not clingy, etc.
It’s absolutely not a genuine way of doing this, obviously, it leaves you confused; unfortunately it is practiced by a lot of people in the dating world.
6. It wasn’t their intention to keep things moving forward.
Perhaps you didn’t discuss where you’re standing with your goals or values when it comes to relationships, and you don’t know where they’re standing on this. It is understandable.
They might want to ‘keep you there just in case’, but they also don’t want to keep things moving forward and start a commitment.
I know it’s confusing, but…
Stop wondering about the reasons. The ones I mentioned above are assumptions and things that are commonly done by people in such situations.
What I’d suggest you do is move one with your life, and just let this one go. If the connection is genuine, and they get back to you, you’ll be getting back to dating with that person again. If there are games involved, and you’re looking for genuinity, then this might not just work for you.
If you feel like texting them will get you peace of mind
You can send something similar to:
“Hey, I haven’t heard from you in a while. How are you?”
“Hi, hope you’re doing well. Things were left like they’re in half, is everything ok?”
If they ignore your texts, then it’s time to move on. They’ll have plenty of room to respond and let you know where they stand at this point. If they’re interested they’ll reach out.
FAQ – Texting after first date
1. Should I send a thank you text after the first date?
Absolutely. You shared time and effort with one another, a simple ‘thank you’ text is just lovely, no matter how the date went.
2. How to start a conversation after a first date?
It can sound difficult to do so, but it isn’t that much. I tried to make it simple, and put it down in 5 sentences:
- You can start by thanking them for sharing time with you.
- You can let them know you listened to a song, or saw a movie they told you about.
- You can ask them if they arrived safely.
- Send them a meme, or a picture, or a song that reminded you of them.
- Send them a simple “Hi. I loved spending time with you last night. How is your day going today?”
3. How long after a first date should a guy text?
Whenever a guy feels like texting. Don’t force yourself into playing games to ‘get’ the person. It’ll only get you games, and more things to ‘play’ with. You’ll have to keep playing games in order for it to keep going, and get you more games.
Be genuine. Text whenever you think it’s a good time to text them.
4. What to do after a first date with a guy?
Well, first things first, it’d be nice to have a conversation with the guy and see where you’re both standing, and how you’re feeling about another date or just a simple meetup.
Once that is settled you can think of what you can do after the first date (which depends on what you did on the first date).
You can go and have activities that’ll allow you both to know more about each other such as hiking, walking in the park, board/card games, etc.
It’s up to you, and the energy you share with one another.