This is going to be an interesting one: How do you know if a guy likes you more than a friend?
You know through his actions, his words, the way he treats you, the way he approaches you. It’s in the little details of his behavior. It’s that mingly energy all around you. Yikes!
I’ll admit, being liked by a guy friend is an interesting position to be in. It’s interesting because you’re either happy that it’s the guy friend you like back, or you’re confused and weirded out because you didn’t expect it from THIS guy friend.
Hell, let’s find out already!
Tips – How to find out if he likes you more than a friend
1. Read the signs.
Read the signs of his body, see if his hips don’t lie. Thought a Shakira song reference in the entrance of an article would be a good idea, still not sure about that yet.
Read the signs, see if he does/says things that indicate if he likes you more than a friend or not. They’re 24, they’re subtle, they’re easy, the signs, I’m talking about the signs.
2. Talk to a friend, or someone you know that has seen you two.
It’s good to have a second thought from someone else that has a different point of view of your connection. Someone honest and sincere will do the work. Also, someone that can actually tell the difference between friendship and romantic attraction, would be a good idea.
3. Pay attention to his words, questions.
When he wants more than friendship, he’ll ask more questions, he’ll want to know more about you, he’ll flirt every now and then. Pay attention to what he says, and how he says it.
4. Pay attention to how much time he’s willing to spend with you.
Whatever connects you two, job, school, uni, activity, see how much he’s willing to spend time with you after the ‘thing’ that connects you two is done for the day.
5. Give him the right space to feel comfortable to ‘confess’ to you.
If he likes you, but is scared of rejection, hence hesitant to tell you, then give him space to tell you, though do it only if you share feelings with him. He touches your arm, you touch his, he compliments you on something, you compliment him too. Give him signs too, you know.
So, how do you exactly know if your guy friend is falling for you? Let’s find out together, through the 24 subtle signs he likes you more than a friend.
1. He doesn’t ‘approve’ any boys for you to be in a relationship with
In a friendship it’s usually ok to talk about relationships and potential ones. However, when it comes to you talking about a potential partner, say you ask his opinion, he somehow always finds ways to tell you that they’re not good enough for you. It’s a form of jealousy, but shown in a more passive way through his friendly manners.
In a few words, he’ll try to find out and give more focus to the negative parts of someone you’re currently seeing/thinking of seeing.
2. He doesn’t make group plans – one on one
Hanging out with a group of friends it’s fun, but one on one with you, it’s a different level. He’ll try to make plans where it’s just you and him included, sometimes it might even feel like you’re going out on dates.
You might even notice him getting distant or maybe sad when you have to cancel plans with him. Now, logically speaking, if he’d only be into the friendly feelings he’d move on in the minute, but he’s into the mingly feelings and he can’t do that (moving on) that easily.
3. Your mutual friends hit you with the “Ah, the love birds…”
“What is the most obvious sign that a guy likes you?”
In my opinion it’s the “Ah, the love birds…”. Friends or family or even other people might notice what you’ve been missing for a while: he likes you more than a friend.
It’s the way you two hang out with each other that just gives that vibe off to people. Whether it is, by the way, you look at each other, or the way you walk when together, talk to each other, your body language when in each other’s presence.
4. He texts you everyday & calls you pretty often
With or without an excuse he somehow manages to be part of your daily chats on your phone. Besides this, you might even get caught up and text or even talk on the phone late at night. Come on! Friends don’t do this.
Another thing to notice when it comes to online communicating is that he always responds immediately to your calls, and doesn’t take too long to reply to your texts. He might even call you with or without a particular reason. Your voice, he wants to hear it.
5. Strangers think you’re a couple
They either think you’re a couple or at least think you have the potential to be one and slam that right into your pretty faces.
This could be, again, from the way you two interact with each other through eye contact, non-verbal communication, verbal communication, etc., and from the way he treats you as if you’re taken.
A little messed up, but it makes sense to a lot of people and women out there. He does these things in order for other guys to think that you’re with him, so that he gets rid of ‘competition’.
6. He has his ways of ‘politely flirting’ with you
It comes off as playful and barely noticeable flirting, hence it can get you confused at times if he’s really flirting, or it’s just you imagining things.
He’ll playfully touch you, say some heart-melting thing here and there, look at you in some type of way, but not overdo it because overdoing it might just expose him. Little does he know…
7. You’ve had ‘more than a friend MOMENTS’
Seriously, cut the bullsh*t! You’ve had at least one of those moments, which I’m sure popped into your head right in the moment you’ve read this. Yes, it is that exact moment, and you know it, you know there was more than friendliness.
Horniness, romanceness, flirtness, I don’t care! It wasn’t friendliness. It made you feel the bond and the emotional connection with him, it’s undeniable.
8. Thoughtful gifts & surprises
Another one of the strong signs your male friend has feelings for you is him buying you gifts (of the thoughtful ones) & making you surprises.
Men are careless pieces of sh*t at times, but not when it comes to someone they like, someone they have feelings for, naah: They care, and they get thoughtful.
He gets you something just because. He remembers your birthday and gets you a gift, or surprises you. He ain’t like other male friends, sister, he’s extra.
9. Long, long… long looks at you
He’s looking at you like you’re this rare creature that needs to be deeply studied, and boy, the scientist is curious!
Now, there’s a different story when the creature looks back at the scientist… He looks away, and feels caught. This is one of those signs your guy friend likes you but is hiding it. The scientist, it’s the scientist. Excuse me.
In case you haven’t got my point: you often catch him looking at you. And you feel that “thing” when you make eye contact. He might even blush at times.
10. Almost everyday is compliment day
If he’s trying to hide it, he’ll find ways to not be so obvious, but will definitely make attempts to point out your good features: personality, looks, intelligence, you name it, dear creature. This occurs very often, if not everyday.
The thing about his compliments is that they’ll be specific, and different from the compliments you usually get. “The scientist” is studying you, so he’ll notice those damn details!
11. He’s happy when you are
Well, well, well… Your guy friend is falling for you. Aaaa!
One of the signs he is falling indeed is when he’s happy when you are. He’s happy in your presence. And when he ‘invests’ things into making you happy, laugh, smile.
Now, a good friend can do that too, but as I said guys at times are careless pieces of sh*t, and it’s okay, judgemental tones are not intended though are too obvious to deny. When he cares, he cares. He’ll make you happy, or at least, the poor thing will try, and will give it a shot at it.
12. He pays for your stuff every now and then
Splitting the bill? Always, if he’s the typical male friend that doesn’t have romantic feelings for you. Rarely, if he’s either got feelings for you, or is super rich and doesn’t know what to do with money.
The point? He’ll show he’s careful through little gestures of kindness. One of them being paying for your stuff at times when you go out.
13. He’ll use every opportunity to be spending time with you
He’ll accept every invitation, and he’ll invite you to everything he can. He’ll use every single opportunity he can to be spending time with you. This is one of the ways you can know your guy friend is falling for you. He can’t help it, he wants to be in your presence as much as he can.
14. He initiates conversations
He’s got his ways to start conversations with you in order to get to know you better. He values your opinions, and listens to everything you say. Most importantly, he remembers even the dumbest things that come out of your mouth.
He’ll be asking for your opinions and ‘approvals’ when he’s making decisions. You’ll be knowing things in detail about one another. You’ll be there for one another when you need someone to talk to. It’s like a Disney movie but with adults, and adult scenes.
15. His friends and family know you, and they give you a look
You asked for signs he likes you more than you think. There you have it. You meet his friends and/or family, and they give you a type of look. You know the look. The one through which they say “Jason has been a pain in the as* all this time talking about you, we all know except you, you dumb b*tch!”
Or a softer one. But you get my point. Another thing you’ll notice is that the people he introduces you to, don’t even attempt flirting with you. That’s because they know they’ll get in trouble.
16. You tell him you’d like to date someone he knows, he doesn’t do anything about it
It’s that hot friend, or cousin, or brother, you tell him you want him to introduce you to them (one of them, I hope), but he’s not going to do anything about it. Not because he’s lazy, not because he doesn’t have time (clearly he’s shown you his availability so far), but because he’s JEALOUS!
He likes you more than a friend, but is scared to tell you, so he carries that heavy weight, and waits for a miracle. He also tries his best to not let anyone ‘steal’ you. It’s what he can do besides confessing.
17. He’s caring when it comes to you
He’ll check your tires, he’ll drop out things (a lot of things) whenever you call him to go out, or just in need of help, he’ll go out waaaay out of his way to make you happy.
Storytime: I had this best guy friend, with whom I’d share everything and everything, and so would he with me, which could be why I didn’t realize his feelings for me at the time. He was telling me about people, I was telling him about people.
I’d consider him like that big brother I never had, because he’d take care of everything. He’d answer my calls, he’d show up at my place when I couldn’t find someone to help me assemble furniture, or when I needed a ride. He’d get snacks on the way, he’d often buy me things ‘just because’. And I was silly, because I thought that’s just how friendships go.
Well, years later… We grew a little distant because of the ways our lives got shaped with time, but he still blushes and is just as caring whenever we meet up.
18. If you’ve been besties: he says “I love you” too often & uses nicknames
He randomly says it, and you get used to that idea. He might just overdo it though. He even calls you nicknames that couples use for each other.
Keep in mind though, this could be true for certain types of men, not everyone. Some are more open, more playful, hence they’re more comfortable with this way of communicating. Some are just closed off a little, and don’t feel comfortable with this way of expressing. Which is fine.
He might jokingly say something like: “Imagine if you and I would date, haha.”
“Yeah, Jason, it’s never happening! Haha.”
19. Physical contact when not necessary
Another one of the signs a guy friend likes you romantically is when he touches you even when there’s no absolute reason to to touch you. Like touch your arm, or your hand, not your boobies or anything else inappropriate.
He’ll tease you with little playful touches. Oh, and not to forget the long ass hugs you two give one another. He’s into romantic stuff now, he’ll want to touch you, and hug you, and look at you, and, and, and.
20. He’s there for you
You know the deal already, he’ll do anything to be there and support you, to uplift you in any way he can, to make you cheerful, to give you joy. His years and years old instinct: provider.
Notice how he doesn’t treat everyone around you that way. He won’t help Kimberly fix her internet connection, or get her a phone case just because he thought it was cute, no, he hates Kimberly. If you like him back, tell him.
21. He notices every little change you make
Cutting your own bangs after a nervous breakdown is quite a decision. A wrong, yet brave one, I’d say. Your other guy friends will notice something’s different about you, but they “just can’t put a finger on it”. THE guy friend will know immediately.
He will notice when you wear something differently, when you’re not wearing makeup, when you pluck your eyebrows a little differently, when you’re happy, when you’re hours before making the wrong yet brave decision to cut your bangs (the second time this month).
22. He’s been acting a little differently lately
How do you know if a guy likes you more than a friend?
He’s been a completely different person recently!! He’s never been the type to be touchy, but he is with you all of a sudden. He’s never been the type to say cheesy things, but he does say them to you all of a sudden. What is the deal Kyle?
The deal with Kyle is that he wants you to notice him in a different way, hence he acts in a different way. He might just stop mentioning other women in his life, or he hasn’t been seeing someone ‘at the moment’ for the past, I don’t know, million? Moments.
He’s not stinky all of a sudden, he’s wearing Chanel perfume all of a sudden. And his hair? Could use a bit more work, but clearly he’s putting an effort. A for the effort Kyle!
23. His body language
His body language too will let you know he likes you more than a friend. He looks at you longer while his pupils dilate, he’s tapping his feet, he’s playing with the car keys nervously, his body is directed towards you. Oh god, he’s leaning in!
24. When introducing you to someone he introduces you by your name or ‘close friend’
Ah, yes. He doesn’t want to put the ‘friend’ label. So he’ll just say “This is Ruby”, or “This is Ruby, my close friend”. God forbid he ever acts too friendly with you. He’ll be getting the feelings. “She’s my friend, but not for long.”
Suggestion: you can watch One Day the movie if you feel like getting inspired, and/or have a better understanding of the signs.
The difference between entirely platonic potentially romantic connection
Distance & boundaries
When it comes to an entirely platonic friendship there are physical, emotional, social boundaries and distance that you two don’t cross when it comes to one another. However, when one or both of you want to cross the friendship line, the boundaries and the distance will start shaking up a little.
When two people make eye contact, there are feelings involved, emotions involved. They differ depending on the connection between people.
So, when two platonic friends make eye contact and perhaps take their time on it, there won’t be romantic sparks lit up. On the other hand, with one extra second of eye contact between two ‘wanting to be more than friends’ there’ll be chills, and feelings involved. There’ll be sparks.
Conversations can be deep in different aspects, so I’m not going to say the conversations are deeper for one or the other type of relation. However, I can surely say that there is flirting (direct, or indirect) when it comes to friendships with the potential to turn into romantic relationships.
Time spent together
Entirely platonic connections tend to be more relaxed when it comes to spending time. On the other hand, potentially romantic connections will not be as relaxed (time-spending wise) – One or both included will find ways and opportunities to spend more time, to be more in the presence of the other/each other.
An example of what a platonic relationship looks like: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCmI2WXVqL8
FAQ – Friendship, or ‘friomanticship’?
Can men and women be friends?
Yes. Yes they can. Though there are scientific assumptions that we’re not biologically wired as humans to be friends with the opposite sex. I don’t think we’re biologically wired to drive, or sit/lay down for hours, but we’re still doing it.
Men and women can be friends, there are living examples, and living proof.
Are we just friends or is he interested?
Well, it entirely depends on his behavior. Read the signs, and see how he feels about you, the relation with you. At the end of the day, a genuine conversation with honest and sincere communication wouldn’t hurt either of you – you can ask him.
What are the signs he only sees you as a friend?
- He might call you nicknames like ‘dude’, ‘bro’, and other nicknames that men/boys use to call their male friends.
- He tells you about other women in his life, and might even ask you for advice.
- He doesn’t flirt, ever.
- He’s a bit more distant when it comes to touch.
- He’ll use his phone carelessly when you’re hanging out together, or even when you’re talking to him.
- There are rarely times when it’s just the two of you hanging out.
Should I tell my partner that my male friend likes me?
Put yourself in your partner’s position. You’d probably feel slightly ‘betrayed’ and start having doubts about your partner if they wouldn’t tell you about such things. Tell him, and try to keep a distance from your male friend.
If you reciprocate the feelings of your male friend, talk it through with your partner, and your male friend, separately. It’s difficult, but it’s one of the right things you can do in this situation.
What do I do if my partner doesn’t want me to hang out with my friend (who is attracted to me)?
The very least you can do is be understanding towards your partner. Put yourself in their shoes, and see how you’d feel if you were in the same situation.
Ask for some time away from your friend, and let them know that all you can offer them is platonic care and love. Give them the time they need in order to ‘get over you’. Discuss it with your partner, and see if you can figure out a way to a common ground.
24 subtle signs he likes you more than a friend – Finding out if he wants more than friendship