Flirting is about fun and enjoyment, but each guy flirts in his way and for his reasons. He will flirt even when he has no intention of seriously pursuing you. He’ll do that for whatever other reason.
According to Jeffrey Hall flirting is divided into 5 types: traditional, physical, polite, playful, and sincere.
An introvert guy can use more of the combination of traditional, polite, and sincere flirting. Whereas, a guy who’s got a flirty personality uses more playfulness and physical touch.
At times, flirting can be subtly or extremely obvious, and at times it can come with hidden signs; let’s find out together through these 13 signs he’s flirting with you:
1. Notice if he has a unique vibe with you – Perhaps a little tension in the air
There is a fine line between being friendly and flirty. To find that out, check out his vibe towards you. He’s flirting if his attitude towards you creates a little bit of tension between you, there’s this special vibe which you can feel, and you know for sure that he’s feeling it too.
If a guy is flirting because he likes you he will find ways to be playful and touchy with you.
He’ll try to keep in touch by asking your number to level up from flirting in-person to online/texting platforms. And later on, there is a date with you in his plans.
2. His playfulness brings in the sexual tension between you
A guy often chooses to express his goofy side to flirt with you. It’s his way of getting your attention.
There’ll be this balance between playfulness and sexual tension. If he has a flirty personality, he’ll do it with others too, but you’ll notice his flirting being a bit more significant towards you.
If he is a little bit shy or has low self-esteem or he’s an introvert he will use the hidden way of flirting. He’ll be gentle and not too harsh with his flirting: the traditional and polite way of flirting. He won’t go out of his way to be goofy, he’ll be polite, smiley, perhaps slightly nervous.
3. He’ll have open body language & be touchy-touchy with you
If he accidentally on purpose touches you a few times try to notice where and how he touches you.
You can tell he’s flirting through his touch – if he goes in for your hand (holding/touching), he touches the low part of your back (Not your bottom!), he grabs you and pulls you close to him while walking, he lightly and playfully touches your hair.
If a guy is being friendly through his touch – he brushes your arm, he stays close to you but has his boundaries, he gives you a light and sort of distant hug.
Remember flirty touch vs. friend touch: Friendly touches are light and brief whereas flirty touches are longer.
4. He uses his funny phrases or acts weird to get your attention and initiate the conversation
If a guy tries every possible way to get your attention through his speech then he is flirting with you. He might use weird, funny, innovative, straightforward techniques when trying to initiate the conversation.
First, let’s start with lame Jokes and pick-up lines. Shall we?
Here are some of the phrases:
1. Hi, Sarah. Omg, you are breathing oxygen too? We have so much in common!
2. You know I never believed in love at first sight, but here I am in front of you.
3. Someone called me, an angel is missing in heaven. I mean, what are you doing here?
4. Wow, your eyes are like emerald green. I am blinded by the light.
5. Does your boyfriend like shrimp just like you? Because I like them a lot. Something he could use to tell whether you are single or not.
Note: If a guy would see you as a friend only he would not bother to grab your attention with lame jokes or cheesy pickup lines.
5. See if he applies his gentleman skills and helps you out
Well, there is still that type of a guy who chooses to be a gentleman around a girl he likes. This is by far my favorite way of flirting.
He listens and pays attention. When you are on a date or you have just met with one another, he still listens to you carefully. It’s a polite way of flirting.
He communicates calmly: A guy who has that gentleman trait tries to lower his voice and be flirty. He communicates softly with you.
He offers his help: He holds your drink, he takes your coat, opens the door for you, etc.
6. Does he laugh at your lame jokes?
One way to find out whether he is truly flirting with you is if he laughs at your lame jokes, or mocks you gently about them. This means that he likes you and wants to continue flirting.
He’ll make eye contact, laugh a little, touch you a little, and tease you a little, yes, even when you make lame jokes!
7. Compliments and long conversations
If he searches to extend the length of your conversation then he is flirting with you. He also throws a few compliments to stay a little longer with you.
“You have tremendously beautiful eyes, and the sweater you’re wearing is matching them quite well!”
He uses his charisma and takes the lead in the conversation. He smiles, makes you feel comfortable each minute, and shifts the attention to you.
8. He’ll be close to you: See if he switches places with his friends to sit near to you
You’re getting his attention, of course, he’ll do the trick of switching places to sit next to you, to be closer to you, and build chemistry through flirting.
It’s not too obvious of a sign, it’s slightly hidden. He’s close to you so that he can touch you, look you directly in the eye, and have closeness to allow privacy to build between you.
9. He’ll make eye contact
This is his way of getting your attention, and building tension. Especially when you’re talking or doing something, his sight will seem to be glued on you!
It’s what flirting is about: building tension, chemistry through our bodies, behaviors, and communication. He’ll use his eyes, and oh-boy you’ll feel them!
He could also show playfulness from a distance through his eye contact. He’ll look, and look away, he’ll look some more, and probably give you a slight smile that’ll melt you.
10. He gives you little gifts
Beware, if a guy gives you gifts, gives you his books or something else then he is interested in you, and gifts could be one of his ways of flirting. He has chosen a hidden sign to flirt with you.
Those little gifts will be followed by touch and smiles, perhaps a few compliments too.
Note: Friends do give gifts or lend things to their friends but only on special occasions and from time to time. If he does this constantly maybe he wants to convey to you a message.
11. He’ll try to teach you new things to make you feel special – You into golfing much?
Well, even if you are not dating or are on your first date, he will make sure to share and teach you about things that you don’t know how to do.
He will try to teach you and use this as a way to be much closer to you. You do not know how to play golf, football, or even dance? No problem! He will be there to show you how it’s done!
12. He tries to tell his presence on social media by commenting or liking your posts
Nowadays in this digital era, flirting has been present also on social media.
You’ll know he is flirting with you on social media if you post something and he likes and comments constantly.
Also, keep an eye on these emojis: 😍😜😊😘😉
If he comments and uses an emoji, he uses that to enforce the meaning of his comment without making that feeling all awkward.
He might say something like:
1. You have an amazing taste in music 😊,
2. You look amazing 😉,
He also replies to your stories with questions:
1. Omg, have you just been there? You should’ve tried to skydive. They offer the best service!
13. He makes sure to tell you indirectly and briefly that he is single
A guy who is truly interested in flirting with you may imply multiple times that he is single.
“I’m here with my guys. I’m single, how are you doing?” He’ll be direct and funny about it.
Or he’ll be indirect and funny about it: “Being single has its positive sides too… Like not having to wear deodorant all the time.”
Let’s explain why a guy flirts with you!
Guys have their motives behind their flirty behaviors, oh yes they do! Here are some possible reasons why a guy flirts with you:
- He wants to get your attention
- He likes you
- He wants to show off his skills to his friends
- He likes the attention that he gets
- He wants only to fulfill his sexual desires
- It’s his way of communicating, he’s a natural flirt
- He wants to see if he still has that charm
- He wants to make sure if he has a social status
- He tries to raise his self-esteem
- He just wants to have fun
- It feeds his ego
- Just wants to feel wanted and desirable
- He could want to be in touch with your friend
How to tell if he is flirting over text?
Even over texting, you can feel the vibe, if he is flirting with you or not. Flirting in person is quite similar to flirting through text, since he likes you he’ll show it to you through text too.
While texting you two are not face to face. It is important to know how to read through the lines. Here’s how you can tell a guy is flirting with you over text:
- He sends to you a lot of compliments;
- He engages in text conversations;
- He will text first and try to keep the conversation going;
- Sends you funny stuff: memes, gifs, videos, etc;
- He sends to you a rom-com movie or any special song; He might send a line from the movie or song and wait for you to respond with the other part;
- He jokingly tells you over text how you make him better;
- He uses funny good morning texts;
- He sends you funny texts to tease you;
- He asks questions about you to shift his attention to you. He doesn’t want to have a self-centered conversation;
Some text examples so that you’ll have an idea that he is flirting, and perhaps flirt back with him over text:
Flirty birthday message: “Hey girl, I think today should be a national holiday since it’s your birthday.”
He compliments you: “You don’t know how my day was pretty terrible today, but your taste in music made it better.”
“Can you stop spreading so much light please, my eyes are burning while looking at the screen!”
Him: “I have a problem right now. Can you help me?”
You: “Yes, what is it?”
Him: “Well, I can’t stop thinking about you.”
Is he actually flirting with me or just being nice? – Let’s prove it!
You know when He’s flirting if he’s touching you, throwing jokes, and building sexual tension. On the other hand, if there’s no sexual tension, nor jokes, nor specific compliments, then he’s being nice and friendly.
Here are some men flirting signals and how you can prove it – Start with small steps such as:
Interact with him too. Touch him slightly and abruptly and notice how he reacts towards it.
Try to recognize if he has boundaries with you or not. A guy who is just nice will set his boundaries even though he might be kind, generous, he won’t respond well to touch or closeness with you.
Try to make a difference in his behavior with others and you. The only way to make the difference whether he is being playful or flirting is to look at the way he behaves with other girls vs you.
Why do guys flirt with girls they don’t like?
As stated above guys or men flirt for different reasons.
Some of the reasons why he flirts with a girl he doesn’t like are:
1. He is feeling down these days and wants to boost his ego,
2. He had a bet with his friend,
3. He’s using flirting with women as a way to escape the pain of a past relationship that’s haunting him,
4. He’s trying to get with your friend,
5. He needs an ego boost.
If you want to continue flirting back with a guy try to know a little bit about him. You don’t want to hurt your feelings later on.
To conclude all this matter: Is he flirting with me or is it just my imagination?
Flirting is supposed to be ambiguous. That is why you get confused sometimes if someone flirts with you.
It’s not your imagination if you feel the vibe, the tension, the energy around you. It’s flowing, it’s playful, and it’s sexual at the same time. What are you waiting for? Flirt back, girl!