The warmth of the holiday season and nostalgia might fuel the fire inside you and suddenly you just want to text your ex.
Yet, whether you should text your ex on Thanksgiving or not depends on your intentions and your relationship with him.
If you still have feelings for your ex but you’re completely healed then you shouldn’t use this as a pretext to communicate with him.
To know exactly what to do in your situation, here are 9 tips on whether you should or shouldn’t text your ex on Thanksgiving:
1. You shouldn’t do it if you want to use it as an excuse to connect
If you’re dying to know what he is doing right now then it’s better to step back and reflect.
Ask yourself what you want to know about him. Is it because you still have feelings for him or the past is holding you back?
Just because you feel the urge to connect with him doesn’t mean that you should text him a Happy Thanksgiving.
Focus on healing first and then on the reason why you want to text him.
If you’re not sure what you’re feeling and what you want after the breakup, you should contact for help a relationship coach.
2. You shouldn’t text your ex if you want to make him change his mind
If your ex has already moved on or if he isn’t contacting with you, you shouldn’t text your ex on Thanksgiving or any other holiday.
Because after the breakup, you and he need some space to clear your head.
And neither one of you can process what happened and what caused the breakup if you’re constantly up to each other’s face.
So, no, texting your ex Happy Thanksgiving won’t make him miss you or get back to you.
The consequences of a breakup are important and if you use a mere excuse like a holiday to connect, it will impact you negatively!
3. When you don’t have feelings for one another
If you are healed and don’t have any type of romantic connection with one another then texting just for holidays isn’t a big deal.
I had an ex-boyfriend that was my friend for years and we chose to go our separate ways because the relationship wasn’t working.
In the beginning, I was scared that I would lose a friend and a lover by asking to end the relationship.
But, we were stronger as friends than as lovers. Thus for years both of us wish Merry Christmas and Happy New Year or birthday to each other.
No type of hard feelings or deep romantic feelings would create awkwardness.
4. If you’re in a new relationship
Should you text your ex Happy Thanksgiving if you’re in a new relationship?
Well, that depends on how you feel about your ex and your past and if your partner accepts your past and isn’t jealous of you.
All breakups are different and all people are made differently and behave differently.
So, if your breakup wasn’t bad but there are still some elements holding you back in the past, texting an ex would be a huge mistake.
Try to work on your feelings first and then you can even get some help from a therapist to understand the urge to text him.
Also, you will reflect on your feelings for your new partner too and check whether you’re in a rebound relationship or not.
5. If you want to just check up on him
Showing that your care for your ex doesn’t always mean that you have romantic feelings for him.
If you two chose to be friends and keep in touch then it’s nothing wrong to text him on Thanksgiving.
You can just say “Hey, Happy Thanksgiving, hope you’re doing great.”
The moment that you keep the text message neutral then you won’t lead him on or create dreams with him.
You only keep a friendly tone and deliver the needed message.
6. If you aim to heal then you shouldn’t text your ex
If you have been using the No Contact Rule and you still haven’t healed enough then you shouldn’t send a thanksgiving text to your ex.
This will only impact you negatively. You’ll start to romanticize certain parts of the relationship and your ex.
Maybe you won’t notice, but when you’re not healed completely, you’ll text him to get him back or hurt him.
Thus, instead, try to write in a journal or piece of paper whatever you want to say to him.
Block or delete him from every social media so you can focus on your healing journey.
7. You shouldn’t text your ex on Thanksgiving to lead him on
You shouldn’t use this moment to boost your ego or ease your loneliness.
If you don’t have sincere feelings for him at this moment is better to not text him.
Try to understand the reason you want to text this Thanksgiving.
Is it because you miss him or you want to keep simple contact with him because you knew one another for a long time?
First, you need to be honest with yourself and then your ex.
8. If he was constantly asking you for favors
When an ex is controlling and constantly tries to stay in contact with you just to fulfill his needs then you shouldn’t text him even on Thanksgiving.
He might want to use your softness, your good heart, and the holiday spirit to just get what he wants.
He might answer back and ask you for money or make-up sex.
This doesn’t happen in every situation but when he is toxic then he might look for every little opportunity to connect with you for his good.
9. When he doesn’t feel the same about you
You should text your ex on Thanksgiving only when you’re healed and both of you have still feelings for one another.
If there is a chance to reconcile then texting him isn’t a bad idea.
But, when he isn’t on the same page as you then you shouldn’t text him.
Because in this case, you might seem needy and trying so hard to get him back.
But, instead of replying, he might ignore your messages because maybe he’s hurt, confused, or has lost feelings for you.
What should I do? I texted my ex for Thanksgiving and he never texted back
If your ex doesn’t text back when you send a Happy Thanksgiving text, you shouldn’t take it personally and double-text.
Instead, try to occupy yourself with other things.
If you’re not healed yet and you’re not in a relationship then try to invest more in yourself than texting him on holidays.
Indeed, it’s hard to be distant especially when you reminisce on your memories together but you should focus on yourself and your future.
1. If you dumped him then try to give him time to reflect on the breakup.
After some time, you might try to text him once again but this time don’t wait to wish him a happy holiday.
Try to apologize to him and be honest. That will make the difference.
2. If he has hurt you or cheated on you maybe he feels ashamed to contact you again.
In this case, this is a sign for you to take a step back and enhance yourself.
If he has cheated on you then there is no space for him to
3. Don’t double-text him if he is a controlling partner and is trying to play mind games with you.
He might not text back because he wants to have the power or the upper hand.
Thus, if you know that your partner might be a narcissist then try to not communicate with him, only if you have kids or business together.
You might use the grey rock method and keep a simple type of communication.
As the therapist Holly Richmond says this method is very useful when it comes to boring a narcissist so he cannot come and go out of your life.
FAQ: Should you text your ex on holidays just because you’re nostalgic?
1. Why do people text their ex on holidays?
People text their ex on holidays due to nostalgia, wanting to connect, needing attention, or they’re hoping to reconcile with one another.
It all depends on how they’re feeling after the breakup. Do they still have feelings for them or do they need closure?
Either way, they do fill a void that is keeping them back in the past or they’re just not holding grudges anymore.
2. Should I text my ex back Happy Thanksgiving?
Whether you should text back your ex Happy Thanksgiving or not depends on how the relationship ended and what you want from your ex.
If you ended up on good terms that doesn’t mean that you always should back.
If interacting with your ex takes you back to the darkest times or doesn’t benefit anything, you shouldn’t text him back Happy Thanksgiving.
It might look like you’re being selfish or rude but believe me you’re setting boundaries and moving forward.
The end: Should I text him and just say Happy Thanksgiving?
You should text your ex on Thanksgiving when you don’t want something from him but just a firm connection.
You should text your ex on Thanksgiving only if it impacts positively both of you and it doesn’t keep you roaming in the past.
Thus, before sending this text ask yourself why you want to send that Thanksgiving text to your ex.
Is it for selfish purposes or do you want to rekindle the romance?
Then decide whether this would benefit you or not.
X’s and O’s,