Joking and being funny are some of the traits that most of us envy when we see them in other people.
However, just because you don’t find yourself funny it doesn’t mean that you are not.
Having someone laugh over text by sharing jokes can be quite the challenge. Not all jokes work in writing.
For some, it is harder to crack a joke online than when they’re with you face to face. It’s harder but it’s not impossible!
Here are 80 jokes to make someone laugh over text:
1. There was a big camel and a small camel. The small camel asked the big camel, “What did you eat to become this big?” the big camel replied “Mhmm”
2. There were two cats, one gray and one brown. The gray told the brown “Meow”. The brown one replied “Meow Meow”. Then the gray one said, “Don’t change the subject!”
3. A man texted a woman saying “The only thing God didn’t give you was my number.” She replied: ”Thank God.”
4. What do you call a tea that has bubbles? – Bubble tea.
5. There was a blonde going to buy a TV. The salesman told her that they didn’t sell TVs to blonds. The next day the blonde dyed her hair brown and asked how much the TV cost. The salesman said: “We don’t sell TVs to blonds”. The blond frustrated said: “How did you know that was me”, he replied, “Because that’s a microwave, not a TV.”
6. Do you know what crickets say in awkward silence? *Crickets sound*
7. There were two ice creams. One was hit by a car and the other melted laughing.
8. Agh. I had a pun about sanity, but I lost it.
9. A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says “what would you like Mr.Horse.” Immediately, Greek soldiers jump out to say their order.
10. “We couldn’t go to Disney this year either”. “Why?” Because there was a sign that said, “Disney left”.
11. What do you eat your pasta with? – My mouth.
12. If life gets you melons, you probably have dyslexia.
13. The barman says “We don’t serve time travelers”
*the man walks in again*
14. Why won’t you ever see a psychologist losing their mind? Because they never mind.
15. What do you call someone at the bar getting up to leave? -Stood up.
16. A prisoner was punished to be executed on the electrifying chair. The guards asked if he had something last to say. The prisoner said “This chair is wack. I wish it was a death bed”
17. Two pairs of shoes were running together. One called to the other “Yo old man. Stop. You’re worn out.”
18. What do you call someone setting up a candle night dinner?- Too broke to pay the bills.
19. A girl asked her friend to go on a blind date with a friend. He didn’t realize she meant it literally.
20. How do you make a water holly? – You boil the hell out of it.
21. What do you call a conversation between a man and a woman through text? – A group conversation.
22. What do you call a programmer trying to find the problem with his code? – Restless.
23. What did Mickey tell Donald when he was sparring with Goofy? – Donald, duck.
24. Man and wife went behind the scenes of a circus. The wife wanted to get on the rope and started arguing with her husband. The man very calmly said: “Be careful, you’re hanging by a thread.”
25. A kid was being yelled at by his father. In the end, her father said: “I am not Happy.” The kid answered, “I know dad. You’re Grumpy”. (The 7 dwarfs reference)
26. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet? Rrrr? – No, it’s c.
27. What’s the worst thing to do at a funeral? – The corpse.
28. A snail got on the ship very slowly. His friends were getting impatient and yelled: “Move your legs, you freaking sailor”
29. The animal kingdom threw a party and decided to send the turtle to get the good stuff. The night came by, then another night came by, and everyone started complaining about why this is taking too long. The turtle turns her head and says “Hey! Don’t push it, I’m on my way to get there!”
30. Why was the tower of Pisa leaning? – Because it had better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
31. How do you know Adele?- Because she keeps saying “Hello from the other side.”
32. A man fell into the well because he couldn’t see that well.
33. Mustard and Mayonnaise were racing. The mustard yelled to the Mayonnaise: “Katch-up”.
34. I have a Portuguese friend who’s a voice technician. A Cezch one too. Cezch one too.
35. I think my butt broke. It has a crack.
36. What did the pot say to the lid?- Would you like a smoke too?!
37. Why can’t a pirate say anything else other than RRR? – Because that is the only letter in a pirate’s alphabet.
38. Two socks were thrown on the washing machine when one of them called: “Leave me out I don’t want to die.”
39. What did baby Yoda tell Captain America? – YODA one.
40. Why do women love Iron-man? -Because they are Fe-males.
41. Did you get a haircut?- No, I got them all cut.
42. What lives at the bottom of the sea? – Sponge-Bob Square Pants.
43. How can you make a tissue shake? – Blow on it.
44. Friend nr.1 asked friend nr.2 to be his wingman. So he put on a wig for him.
45. You know, I used to hate facial hair. But yours grew on me.
46. What do you call two cows spying? – A steak out.
47. What wears a white shell suit? – An egg.
48. What do you call having a stroke on camera? – A good damn actor.
49. What do you call a coffee addict that doesn’t have caffeine yet? Depressed.
50. I am glad for gravity. If not for it, we never would have had a fall.
51. What do you call two eggs that keep laughing? – Cracked up.
52. A child saw a man with a bruised eye. He called to his mum: ”Mommy, mommy, look at the panda!”
53. Do you know a mouse that walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. Do you know a duck that walks on two legs? Donald duck. No, mufos. All ducks walk on two legs 😛
54. You know, I tried being normal once…I almost didn’t make it.
55. I never had asthma before, but that just took my breath away.
56. My calendar won’t last long :(. Its days are numbered.
57. My brother asked for 6 Sprites from the store. Instead, I got him 7UP.
58. Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist use the bathroom? – Because the P is silent.
59. I got advice for you. Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
60. What breed is Dracula’s dog?- A bloodhound.
61. What did one toilet tell the other? -You look a bit flushed.
62. Why can’t Elsa from Frozen be mad? – Because she has to “let it go, let it go”
63. What’s one gift you will get for your birthday, guaranteed? – A year older.
64. Who went to the moon for the first time?- No, not him. The cow that jumped over the moon. 😛
65. When’s a door, not a door anymore. When you leave it ajar.
66. Why do kids wear glasses in math class? – Because it helps them with division.
67. My teacher told me I will never be much in life because I tend to procrastinate. So I had enough and said, “You just wait…”
68. What do you call a dog with amputated legs? – Never mind, it will never come anyway.
69. Do you know why the tomato turned red?-Because it saw the salad dressing.
70. You know what to never say at a funeral right? – I apologize.
71. Do you know why cigars are good for the environment? – Because it kills people.
72. Do you know why a rooster sings in the morning? – Because he has to go to work.
73. I keep telling you to stop looking for a perfect match; use a lighter instead ;D
74. Nobody wants my job. It’s too secure.
75. It was tense when the past, the present, and the future walked in.
76. I am unique. There’s no one else like me. Thank God!
77. I had a sweet side. I decided I didn’t like it anymore so I ate it.
78. I should date someone who can’t wait to see me like I can’t wait to see Friday.
79. Do you know the cheapest ticket price? – 50 Cent.
80. Do you know what Bach’s ghost said after he died?- I’m decomposing.
Spilling the tea! – How can I make someone laugh over text?
Sure, being funny is a talent, and wit is something you are born with. That’s at least what people say.
If you feel like you’ve got no talent in ‘funniness’ or that you’re not born with a wit, trust us, with a bit of practice and training nothing is unachievable!
You can make people laugh over text with just a few tricks up your sleeve.
You’re funny but you haven’t released your inner comedian yet.
Here are 8 ways you can rewrite your joke to make someone laugh over text:
1. Exaggerate, so much that you can’t be taken seriously
Using hyperbole will make it easier for the other person to make up an extreme picture in their head.
When priming to deliver the punchline, be sure that it isn’t rushed or that the joke doesn’t match the situation.
If you are having a boring text conversation, and you want to keep the conversation going, you can drop a random text that is so exaggerated that they can’t take it seriously.
Via such hyperbole, they will know that you are joking and maybe, you can get a full-on laugh out of them.
Another thing to make someone laugh over text is to take the situation, recreate it to extremes, and deliver it when you sense that the atmosphere is getting a bit heavy.
2. Try to picture an absurd image in their mind.
The best way to make someone laugh hard over text is to create an absurd image in their head by being as specific as possible.
When this is already set up, more than half of the job is done since it is already funny in their head. So what’s left to do is to just deliver the punchline.
Don’t make the punch line predictable. The only way you can make them laugh through text is if the line is unpredictable and outrageous.
3. Make it unexpected.
The best jokes are the ones that hit you unexpectedly. So to have them laugh over the text you can start the conversation with a joke.
This will make them laugh hard and cheer up through text, and your joke will be well received.
Is the conversation reminding you of a joke? Don’t keep it in. Roll it and use the joke to make someone laugh over text.
4. Use sarcasm to induce a laugh over text.
If you can’t remember jokes off top of your head, you can use sarcasm to make someone laugh hard over text.
Be careful though, not everyone is a fan of sarcasm and might interpret you as being rude.
If the other person is someone you’ve known for a long time, they probably know your sense of humor and are already used to it.
It is a bit hard to deliver your jokes over text since there is no cadence, tone, or body language sign that will avoid misunderstandings.
So if you think that you can drop a random joke over text to make someone laugh, think twice if that is appropriate for the medium you are using.
5. Pay attention to the delivery of the joke.
To make the other person laugh over the text, you need to rethink the structure of the joke for it to work in the text.
The delivery differs from text jokes to speech ones, thus punctuation will play a crucial part when it comes to writing your jokes down.
When it comes to telling jokes to make someone laugh over text, your literary skills and your creativity will come quite in handy.
You will need to rephrase sentences, rethink phrases, and sometimes even leave things out for it to make them laugh over text.
6. Be specific about the setup situation.
You know, a joke will be understood differently when you know what specifics to mention before the punch line.
While being economical with words through texting has to be done, dropping the main specifics will not make the joke worth the laugh.
Thus, you need to be specific when it matters and you know the joke won’t work well without those details.
When you have that down, you will have the main structure ready to cheer up over text.
7. Have a small pause before sending the punchline.
Yeah, priming is important, but the timing when delivering the punchline will determine whether it’ll make someone laugh at your joke over text or not.
Don’t text all of your jokes in one text message. Save the punchline for a separate text.
When you assume that the person has already finished reading the text, that’s when you hit send to the punchline.
This is how you will have someone laugh on text since just like in speech, timing is everything.
8. Don’t be offensive.
You probably have heard the advice “if it is funnier than offensive, say it”, but I wouldn’t recommend it.
Sure, they can send a “Lol” as a reply but you won’t know if that joke worked on making them laugh over text since you can’t see them.
Save those jokes for when you meet face to face, instead make them laugh hard and cheer up over text by sticking to simple jokes that can’t be misunderstood.
What you need to consider before you tell a joke is to make them laugh over text!
Joking can be a great way to break the boringness through text or have someone lighten up from their tiring day.
But before you decide to make them laugh their heart out with your jokes, you need to consider:
- The medium. You will need to transform your joke for it to work. So not all jokes will cheer someone up on text because not all jokes can transcend the borders of speech and writing.
- The person. If it is someone new and you are getting to know each other, it is not highly recommended to send dirty jokes or something you would send to a long-time best friend. Keep it light!
- The relativity of offensiveness. Keep the receiver in mind and somehow predict if the joke might hurt them. Since it is through text, you can’t be sure which nail you’re hitting. What’s not offensive to you, can be offensive to them!
- The timing. Timing is everything when you want to tell a joke to make someone laugh over text, or in general honestly. Don’t just throw them around in inappropriate situations. Even jokes have a purpose and can only be enjoyed when the timing is right.
Good luck with your jokes!