A guide to actually impress him on the first date.
Ah, the early sweet stages of dating. Your heart is beating, you’re alive, all good, all lovely. You like this guy, I have no idea how you met him, but thank god the time for the first date has come, and thank god you’re asking yourself ‘how to impress a guy, or that guy on a date?’ On your first date, to be more precise.
That should be easy, right? Winning a guy over on the first date. Right?
It is. But for it to be easy, you have to drop something. You have to drop the thought of ‘I got to impress him’ before you show up to your date. You can’t do dating with that way of thinking, honey.
Go there with the idea that you’re about to meet up with him and see if you’re going to like him back. If you’re going to be a good match for one another. Have some standards, will you?
Now that we’ve got that cleared out, I think you’re ready for the 16 sure ways to secure you your way to a guy’s heart on the first date:
1. Don’t be late
They caught us on our ‘grand entrance’ bullsh*t; that belongs to the past now. Being late is no longer cool, though I like to argue that it never was, in the first place, cool.
Let’s be honest, when things are on point, heads will turn(if that’s your intention) even when you’re early or in time. So, being on time is your way to succeed in impressing a man on the first date. You made it to the first step, congratulations!
2. A clean, comfy, appropriate and well maintained appearance is what we’re looking for
What does a clean, comfy, appropriate and well maintained appearance mean? It means you’re wearing and looking nicely washed, with nicely washed clothes; You’re feeling comfortable with what you’re wearing; and your clothes are appropriate for the activity, place, and weather.
Trust me, the wrong outfit, like a light jacket on a walk out on a cold winter day, has the potential to ruin your date.
When you feel comfortable, you’ll be confident. And you shine when you’re confident. You shine!
3. A good nice signature smell is another thing we love
You don’t want him gasping for air. You just want him to feel that nice smell that represents you, and keep it in mind so when he smells it elsewhere, it reminds him of your fabulousness and your amazing self.
Honestly, when you smell good, or even if it is just clean, it doesn’t have to be an expensive fragrance, it’s a good initial impression to make.
4. Start it with a nice, friendly, warm hug
In the first meeting, it’s important to have a good start. A hug will help break the iceness between you. Well, not exactly ‘break’ the ice, it’ll more likely melt it.
You’re open, you’re nice and lovely, you’re vaccinated hopefully, go for a hug! You’ll thank me later.
5. If you can, sit next to him instead of in front of him
Now, this doesn’t mean to just sit next to him and never look him in the eyes. Nor does it mean that sitting in front of him is a bad idea. It’s just that it makes it easier for you to avoid those first date awkward silences. You know the ones.
You’ll get a sense of observing the surroundings, something like people-watching, instead of running out of words to say. Instead of drawing in that awkward silence, while you meet eyes every once in a while, and smile uncomfortably.
Impressive about this is how you thought of such an amazing idea, and how the date wasn’t uncomfortable for one moment (silence-wise).
6. Be confident, but don’t overdo it to arrogance
You’re feeling confident, you’re looking good, smelling good, you’re aware of your package. That doesn’t mean you have to be arrogant and slap your amazingness on his face all the time.
You’re confident yet humble. It’s an impressive feature to have in this day and age. It’ll impress a guy on a first date. It’ll impress anyone.
7. Reciprocate on the conversation: ask thoughtful questions
If you feel like getting to know him better, you gotta ask those questions, woman! Ask him about his interests, what he loves doing, how he spends his time, his opinion on certain topics/movies/books/music, etc.
Showing him that you’re not self-centered by asking something about him too, being mindful of the reason you’re out – which is BOTH of you want to know each other better and perhaps that leading to sex eventually, though not necessarily tonight – is impressive. Wow!
8. Don’t try to impress him
It’ll be obvious, and it’d take you to pretend, and ‘fix’ things in order to be more ‘impressive’. Just be who you are, exactly who you are; if you’re not now, it’ll eventually come out, and then there’ll be surprises… I’m afraid not the best surprise.
Oh, and don’t go with the thought of ‘is he going to like me’ mindset. Drop it here, and let it rotten right here, right now.
You’re supposed to see if you’re a good match for each other, to know more about each other, not to impress each other under every circumstance. You’re not that desperate, we both know it.
9. Crack jokes if you’re good at it
AAAA! A good sense of humor is one of the most attractive features one can have. Be playful, if that’s what you originally are. Crack jokes if you know you nail them everytime.
If you’re aware of your awesome sense of humor, use it if you want to impress a man on a first date, hell second, third! Use it for as long as you can. He’ll be there for it, and he’ll want more of it. Another impressive thing… Wow!
10. Don’t be negative to seem cool
That’s anything but impressive. If you’ve got a pessimistic personality, I’m not gonna guide you to suppress it and pretend you’re optimistic.
I’m going to guide you not to pretend to be so ‘unpleased’ or so ‘hard to be made happy’ if that’s not who you are. Some have this type of personality, and they seem cool to some. If it’s not naturally who you are, drop it right now, right here. It’s not cool.
11. Listen to him, I’m talking actively listening
Wanna hear something impressive? A person that actually listens to understand, and not to listen by being quiet so that they get their turn to talk. That’s impressive, that’s hot, that’s sexy.
Why is it so impressive? Well, it’s rare to find; Not everyone does active listening.
“I’m so happy to finally find someone that actually pays attention to what I’m saying.”
That’s what he said.
12. Be open: verbally and physically (body language)
Verbally open and positive, means to keep your daily naggings in your pocket and save them for your friends. They’re used to those, they’ll bear a couple more today.
This time you want to talk and open discussions on things you’re passionate about, things that make you happy and joyful.
Physically open (body language wise) means to smile, laugh, and have an open body posture. He will show it through his body language too, if he likes you.
It makes you make him feel welcomed and warm. It’ll impress him.
13. Own the spilled drink/food!
Spilling wine, dropping a fork, or messy-eating a burger like you do when you’re alone, just own it! The day/night is short to apologize for hours about the fact that you broke the glass and everyone around you stared at you.
Seriously, it doesn’t matter. Owning whatever goes ‘wrong’ during the date, and not spending the rest of the date talking about it, is quite a thing to do. Another thing to do to impress him on the first date is checked! Next!
14. Be present, enjoy the date
Being present on the date means listening, being there without any other distraction. Trust me, you’ll enjoy it. Of course if he’s a decent person for you too.
Not everyone is capable of being fully present nowadays, we’ve got so many distractions waiting around for us, hence being there, actually there, will make room for “GUYS! I FOUND HER!”.
Your phone will annoy both of you. It’ll annoy him especially when he’s talking. Guess who’s not impressive? You.
Listen to what he has to say, talk mindfully, mean what you tell him, embrace what you are: be present.
15. First date gifts for him – What do you give a guy on a first date?
Should I actually bring a gift for him on the first date? And if so, what to gift a guy on a first date?
Well, you’re definitely not obliged to, but if you feel like bringing a gift on your first date with this guy, here are some ideas:
A box of chocolates. Nice and sweet. This is my top pick, and my go-to choice. Let’s call it a personal favorite; Simply because it shows that you’re thoughtful and that you care enough, but not overdo it with the romanticity.
A guitar pick if he plays guitar. Or anything else that’s small, not too expensive, and connects with him as a person and as a unique personality. For example: let’s say he’s got a dog and loves him to death, get him something for his dog.
Flowers. Let go of the standard and get him flowers if you feel like doing so. Flowers are a good sign of interest, care, and delicateness. Show him that.
A book. This is another one of my personal favorites. It’s honestly one of the best gifts you can give someone. If he mentioned some book (that’s not too expensive too) then get it for him, as a first date gift. Honestly, it’s perfect.
A candle. It doesn’t take too much effort, and there are good inexpensive options. It’s a simple sign of thoughtfulness which you show through a simple gift such as a candle. Light it up, girl!
16. Flirt with him – How to flirt on a first date?
Well, it might sound a bit odd, but flirting could be done easily right on a date. First, you have to be confident, and aware of your flirting skills, otherwise it can go terribly wrong. You want to flirt lightly, especially on a first date, you don’t want to overwhelm him. Here are some easy first date flirting tips:
Make eye contact. Not a stare to death, just a warm look letting him know you’re there, you’re present, you’re interested, you’re curious.
Eye contact helps in building a connection, helps you both connect with one another. Look at him in the eyes while he’s talking, or while you’re talking. Build that impressive connection.
A little bit of touch. Touch is another thing that helps you both release tension, and be more open to one another. A warm, friendly, rather than a full on sexual touch. Don’t scare him by gluing yourself to him.
Smile and radiate light, you! Smile while you look him in the eyes. Not in a creepy way please. It’ll come naturally, so don’t stop it when it does. Also, don’t force it if you don’t feel like smiling.
It has to be organic, it has to be felt. Smile if you feel like smiling, look him in the eyes while doing so.
Touch your hair if you have them, woman! You’ll draw his attention to another seductive feature of you. Don’t be all ‘shampoo commercial’ on him; do it gently.
How to act on a first date with a guy – An etiquette if you will
I wouldn’t necessarily say act, but if you’re clueless on what to do, and/or what to say when on the first date with a guy, then this will come in pretty handy to you. Here:
1. Give details while having a conversation. When he asks you something, feel free to talk more than just a short cold answer. Knowing more is why you’re there with one another. It’ll also give you both room to expand your conversation on topics.
2. Embrace your feminine energy. If light and gentle is what you are, embrace it! You’re caring, with smiley eyes, embrace it. Be as you are.
3. Compliment him on something you genuinely like about him. Another thing that’s in the past and it’s unattractive, is acting indifferent and pretending to not like him if you do.
If you like something about him, tell him. Not throw it in his face for the rest of the night; a simple, meaningful and thoughtful compliment will do.
4. Be nice and polite, not just to him. Of course, you’re nice and polite, right? But you don’t want to just be polite and nice around him. Treat everyone nicely. That’s a basic thing, I believe you already know. I’m putting it here, just in case you forgot, or something.
5. Offer to pay, or split the bill but leave it there when he insists. Men are pressured to pay the bill on the first date. Personally, I don’t care about this standard, and I understand when a man cannot afford to pay for the entire dinner. If you’re like me, and want to offer to pay, do it.
However, if he insists on paying for it, leave it there. Let him pay. It’ll give him a sense of ‘taking care’, men like that.
6. You can disagree when you really disagree, keep it light though. Agreeing with him when you’re questioning everything he said in your mind isn’t the way to go. Disagree with him. It means you’ve got your own original opinions too, it means you have opinions.
You don’t want to start a hot debate out of it. Just let him know if you have a different opinion from his. It makes the conversation more interesting, and you both learn from each other’s perspectives on the topic.
7. Don’t overdo with the timing of the date. If it flows naturally as a long date, then it’s understandable, and you don’t want to cut it off just because you read it in some article that it’s good to do so.
However, if you see that there’s not much left to discuss and it’s been quite some time since you’re out, feel free to go home. Leave some for the next dates, won’t ya?
Essential tips for a first date with a guy
Judge and analyze his behavior instead of concentrating on ‘Am I doing this right?’ This is one of the most basic things you must keep in mind. Now we can go on and see our top, essential first date tips:
- Be curious about him, like actually curious;
- Make sure you have a ride home;
- Be polite and thankful, and not just to him;
- Please be careful with the alcohol;
- If you’re not feeling it(anything), don’t force yourself into it;
- Don’t cuss in order to be cool;
- Do you dance well? If yes, show it!;
- If you can, choose a fun activity;
- Don’t do something you’re not comfortable with;
- Don’t go with the ‘I hope he likes me’ mindset;
- Text him after the first date;
- Don’t get all caught up on his compliments for you.
FAQ – First date with a guy
1. Should the man pay on the first date?
This depends a lot on the personal perspective on this topic. I don’t think a man should pay on the first date. I’d say if you feel like paying, then you can at least offer, or just split the bill.
If the guy insists, then leave it there.
2. Do guys expect a kiss on the first date?
Not really. A kiss on the first date is usually not expected unless there’s shared chemistry, the date was decent, and if you both feel like kissing.
When a guy likes you on the first date:
- He’ll most likely show it through his body language;
- He’ll communicate more freely with you;
- He’ll let you know that he’s having/he had a great time;
- He genuinely seems impressed by you;
- He will text you to make sure you arrived safely.
4. What not to say on a first date with a guy?
Here are the 6 things not to say on a first date with a guy:
- “I want [number] kids.”
- “I’d like to be in a long-term relationship with you.”
- “I hate this place.”
- “This waiter is irritating me; he doesn’t seem to do anything right.”
- “My ex used to do/say that.”
- “You should pay for the date, I’m not splitting the bill.”
5. What do guys notice on a first date?
A few things that guys notice on a first date are:
- Good communication;
- Good flow of the date;
- Appearance: nice, clean clothes, smile, laughter, eyes, posture, etc;
- Your smell.