Using mainly explicit language and sharing intimate pictures with the man you love or are infatuated with over text won’t always turn him on.
What will turn him on depends on his personality, what he finds attractive, and what he needs currently.
Most importantly, focus to make him comfortable, by sharing your true intentions and colors.
Thus, being yourself and initiating subtle flirty texting will turn him on.
If you’re already in a relationship, then you can be straightforward with sexting.
Show him your cravings or reminisce on your spicy experience together.
So, whatever your relationship status is, feel free to adjust yourself to these 13 tips to turn him on over text:
1. Start with building up emotional attraction
To turn a guy on over text when you just started talking or dating, you should create a special bond.
Building a bond is an ongoing process, that’s why you should start from scratch.
Start with good morning texts, show your intentions and let him wonder.
Thus, you will leave space for know you better because now he starts to fantasize to spent time with you for the rest of the day.
Let me tell you about my own experience. A long time ago (ages ago), I met a guy at my friends’ birthday party.
We started texting two or three days per week. He was shy and I wanted to spice up things a little bit after a few weeks.
Having not so much experience in dating my guy friend said to me one thing.
“Callisto, if you want to spice things up, you should add some excitement and mystery, besides showing your good intentions.”
And that’s why I did, things changed for the better.
2. Be confident and your authentic self
Buunk and Dijkstra (2002) claim that both genders label confidence as an attractive element in a potential partner.
Thus, even if you want to turn him on in seconds over text, you should avoid talking about your ex or coming out as needy.
- Define your likes and dislikes; This will help you define your boundaries too;
- Avoid creating a new personality just to adjust to his personality;
- Don’t initiate text by always apologizing for the smallest thing.
I am not implying that you shouldn’t apologize when needed but do not do it for the smallest inconvenience.
If you are already in a relationship then you can initiate flirty and hot conversations.
Men like it when you show that you are also interested in him sexually or you are turned on.
3. Send him random subtle sexual innuendos
If you are not sure how he will react if you build up sexual tension, it’s better to start small.
Especially, if you didn’t use much sexting before it is better to start by using subtle and suggestive language.
Also, researchers claim that people will react to sexting in the same way that they use it.
You can begin by being flirty and using compliments that will let him fantasize about you.
1. Keep it casual just by showing how much you admire his presence. Use specific adjectives that show how much his presence complements you.
“I was laying in bed and was thinking how lonely my left pillow is feeling right now.”
“I am still thinking about what we experienced last night. I can still smell your perfume😊.”
4. You might consider triggering his masculinity
You can turn a guy on over text by triggering his masculinity, but still, make sure that it does not turn into something toxic.
Yet, as the psychotherapist, Del Lewenthal claims that men can cultivate healthy masculinity by embracing their soft side too.
Once, you make him feel that he is a part of your life then this will make him feel good about himself.
- If you are just dating then text him and ask for his advice on something that you will want to buy.
According to how close you are to one another, you can ask his advice on whether to buy panties or in which restaurant to dine.
- On the other hand, if you’re in a relationship, you can turn him on over text by showing appreciation or supporting him.
5. Text him a few double-entendre examples
One of the ways to innocently turn him on over text is to use double-entendre examples and keep the conversation casual.
Therefore, you will be able to express what you’re feeling or thinking without being too straightforward.
You won’t scare him away and at the same time you will
“It’s getting way too hot in here, I don’t know if it’s because of the weather or because of you.”
“As Shakespeare used to say, Shall I lie in your lap *facepalm emoji*?
6. Suggest to him an activity that you would like to do together
If you don’t feel like sexting or you are just getting to know one another, you can choose a perfect spot to send to him.
First, get to know what he likes to do or when he likes to go and then send him that place or that activity.
- If he likes to climb and there is a perfect view then you can take a picture of it and send it to him.
- Additionally, you can write how would you love to lie on the grass by his side and watch this view or the sunset.
You start by mentioning small details that remind him of good times that you had or memories that you could build together.
7. Tell him about your sexual expectations or desires
Turning a man on over text means that you should connect your mutual desires to his fantasy.
Especially, if you are in a relationship and you want to keep the flame alive then you should let go of the fear of being sexual.
Yet, you should keep in mind as Freud stated some people might be attracted to specific people. This makes it more difficult for you to deliver your intention.
I am not implying that you should use nudes or constantly do dirty talk or pressure him.
- What you can do is express how much you appreciate him and how would your sexual desires meet.
- My advice is to not sugar-coat things or write sexual fantasies that aren’t yours.
- If you are bubbly and like to make jokes, use these traits to share your sexual desires
I am aware that sometimes you cannot put into words your needs and it takes time for you to understand your sexual desires.
If you start to work with a personal coach then you can break it down into small pieces so you know how to use them in your favor.
8. Be blunt and funny
Honesty is much appreciated by a man that is dating to marry or form a serious relationship.
If you want to turn him on over text then you might consider being honest, funny, and respectful.
You should diffuse controversial topics that might feel him bad about himself.
Something that you shouldn’t use in your texts is elements of mocking his religious views or his appearance or genital parts.
❌ ”How do they call a man with a small weenie? A keeper…”
✔️ “Do you want to be mine? You can easily choke me with that smile of yours.”
9. Send him a link to a romantic or hot movie/song
If you want to tell a guy that you want to do him sexually through text and not seem cringy or weird, you can use any movie or song.
Make sure that is something that you might have talked about earlier or is some type of media that he would enjoy.
You might suggest watching any romantic movie that specifies your desires.
1. Let’s take, for example, the movie 50 shades of grey.
You can recommend it to a guy that you might have been dating for a couple of months and you want to take it to the next level.
In particular, if you are maintaining a long-distance relationship then you should do it so you can keep the excitement alive.
10. Text him some exciting details about you
You can turn a guy on over text without being obvious while sharing some small details even about your daily routine.
“I got out of the shower right now and I am trying to get ready for work.”
“Just got home from the gym. I will take a shower and put my favorite red pajamas on.”
Both of these texts are not using specific hot words or explicit emojis to turn him on.
You only are defining your routine or explaining parts of your day that include details that will trigger his sexual fantasies.
When he knows that you got out of the shower, immediately he will want to be there with you and experience it.
Asking flirty and dirty questions over text is what turns him on.
No matter if you are dating or in a relationship, challenging him with some questions will turn him on.
The main aim of asking these types of questions is that you will get to know one another and build sexual tension.
- How would you like to kiss me right now? In a French or American way?
- What attracts you to me? Both physically and non-physically.
- What do you want tonight? A quickie or a whole session?
Depending on whether your partner likes dirty questions or jokes, you can use these to adjust to your affinity.
12. You might send him some pictures of you
Sending him a picture of you doesn’t mean that those need to be nudes.
You can send him pictures of you showing a little bit of skin or cleavage that is enough to catch his eye.
Choose photos that you would post on Instagram or on any other social media.
Avoid sending immediately nudes or other photos that could be misused by the guy that you’re dating.
Other than this, you might use as Feinberg (2008) explains that voice has a big role when it comes to sexual attraction.
To turn a guy on over text, you should use voice messages also where you can ask him for help, joke around, or compliment him.
13. Ask for some favor or something in return
Challenging a guy will turn him on because you’re triggering his masculine side and putting him in “charge”.
Now, you should not leave things to his imagination but take action.
For example, as mentioned earlier this guy, let’s call him Jake. After I started to send him good morning and flirty texts, he started to mirror my behavior.
Yet, to make a relationship work, you need to upgrade things constantly and add excitement.
So, I decided to ask for his help to fix the table on my porch. I wrote something like this:
“Hey Jake, my table is in need and crying out for your strong muscles. Can you make it by 5 at my house?”
What to do if he doesn’t get the sexual hints?
Not every guy can grasp the hidden sexual hints over text seemingly.
Also, researchers have found that you cannot arouse a man and woman in the same way. The brain works differently to sexual stimuli according to gender.
Especially, if you have been just talking and not dating yet, you still don’t know how he might react to a sext.
- If you try to sext and he doesn’t get the hint then you can try once more before being blunt with him.
In this case, try to learn more about him and what he likes and dislikes. Once, you know about his preferences it is easier to be flirty and poke him.
- On the other hand, he might be ignoring these signs because either he doesn’t like you that much or is still confused.
No matter the reason, if he doesn’t mirror you then you should give him some space.
Don’t try to put much pressure on him by constantly texting dirty jokes or sending pictures of you.
This will only pull him away and he will slowly start to lose interest because he doesn’t have the space to think clearly.
- Despite this, if you come off as too strong with your sexual hints then this might make him feel uncomfortable.
Especially, if you just have started talking and don’t know one another in real life.
It’s true that men in general like dirty talk and flirting over text but this doesn’t apply to all of them.
I will suggest you be flirty and make subtle jokes with him but never cross your or his boundaries.
Try to get to know what he likes about you and what turns him on or drives him wild.
After getting to know him better on the first date, then turning him on over text will be easier.
How to react if this guy misuses my texts or photos?
If you suspect that this guy is using these texts or your photos for his benefit or has mal intentions then you should talk with him.
Because nowadays with dating apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and others things progress differently, and being sexual is quite preferable.
That’s why you should try to take things slowly, no matter if you seem DAF or uncool to this guy.
If a guy wants to date you and has good intentions, he might not need your photos to turn him on.
He will be interested to know more about your passion and your life.
1. Yet, if you have already sent these photos or very spicy texts and he is sharing with others, talk with him.
If he refuses to do it then you can let him know that his behavior is unacceptable.
Then you can ask particular organizations or authorities to deal with this case.
You might consider changing your number for privacy issues and make sure your texts are not being accessed without your permission.
In the end: How to arouse a man with texts
If you want to arouse a man with texts, you should keep a balance between being flirty, honest, sexual, and authentic.
Make sure to confess your desires and fantasies to him, but make sure to do it subtly.
Nothing turns on a man more than knowing you have good intentions and you find him sexy.
If you are on the same page, then flirting and being honest will either elevate the relationship or keep it exciting.
So, be playful, genuine, and true to your priorities, but most importantly respect your and his boundaries.
You got this,