Nowadays, modern dating and modern relationships are mainly based on dating apps and texting.
Since physical interaction isn’t available at this point, you should use your words to impress him.
It’s important to establish a comfortable and meaningful conversation and environment.
Since you cannot force or make him like you, you need to be understanding and find common ground to trigger his feelings.
Without further ado, here are 12 tips to get a guy like you over text:
*Spoiler Alert: This article is exciting, inspiring, and informative. It shows that relationships or feelings cannot be forced, just ignited/triggered.
1. Be original: Show your personality organically
The golden rule to get a guy to like you over text is to be yourself.
And as the relationship coach Lisa Marie Bobby claimed before jumping into the dating realm, you need to dig deep and work on yourself.
So, once you’re confident and you have set your boundaries: this will attract him.
A guy can feel the real vibes and genuine attention when a woman is being genuine.
Revealing your weird and authentic self slowly isn’t something wrong. It’s an invitation for him to be real with you too.
So, to create a healthy attraction, get his attention and get him to like you, you need to be confident and share your opinion.
2. Show interest in him and be a good listener
To show interest in him doesn’t mean to bombard him with personal questions.
Try to have a more subtle approach. You might ask him about his interests, his point of view, and his goals.
- To show him that you’re a good listener, try to ask specific questions, and offer your help and your opinion regarding the matter.
- Show that you value his thoughts and feelings by engaging in conversations and replying to his questions.
It’s important to respect his perspective on things and his desires.
You might do it by incorporating your perspective and experiences with his – find common interests.
3. Try to learn his text habits and style
Let me tell you this from my experience. My partner is shy and he doesn’t like texting to this day.
He always said that he didn’t feel comfortable opening up to a person he doesn’t know over text.
At first, I was pissed, I cannot lie to you. It took him 24 hours to tell me an interesting story about himself.
He told me later after we met in person that he found it difficult to trust and his texting skills weren’t that good.
- To learn his texting style and habits pay attention to the tone he uses.
- Check out the timing when he replies and how long it takes.
To have healthy communication with him, be concise and use clear language to avoid misunderstandings.
Try to use a friendly tone and use a bit more emojis to have a positive impact.
4. Let him know more about your funny side
No matter if you label yourself as overly funny or not at all, try to use that little particle of humor in your body.
Tease him a little bit by being flirty and showing your intelligence enough to make him think about you and trigger his feelings.
You can achieve it by observing what are his interests and what type of humor he likes.
Ask questions and let him know what type of humor you like. For example: “Have you seen that funny scene from SNL with Michal B. Jordan? It was hilarious.”
Then your conversation can take place from there where you can tease him using Pop culture references.
5. Don’t be the only one to initiate the conversation
When you’re the only one initiating the conversation, it will make him feel like he’s not giving the proper effort.
I am aware that how much you communicate with him depends on your attachment style.
If you have a secure attachment style then you will text him because you want to not because you need him.
Thus, try to have a balanced conversation.
You can achieve it by working on your attachment style with a relationship coach and mirroring his texting habits.
6. Keep balancing your enthusiasm, communication, and patience
Most of the time the feelings that are cultivated especially through texting might make you euphoric.
And you might ask many personal questions that aren’t appropriate for the talking stage.
Thus. to get a guy like you over text and continue the conversation you should take things one step at a time.
- Avoid acting as if you’re a couple. Don’t ask him to give you explanations of where he’s been for days.
In this case, you should have a subtle approach, and set your boundaries while letting him know what you find appropriate or not at this stage.
Get to know his habits and personality and find out if you’re compatible.
7. Don’t make the conversations all about you
To make a guy like you over text, you should avoid making a one-sided conversation.
If you initiated the last conversation or asked questions, now let him do the same.
As the dating coach for men, Blaine Anderson said: “You don’t have to show that you’re the best in online dating or while texting.
You need to give and show your best by interacting with him at least twice a week just to ignite an emotional connection.
So, balancing a conversation and letting him engage in the conversation the same as you will impact him positively.
8. Try to use other media than just texting with words
Texting in the talking stage is a useful tool because you have the chance to be more creative than just talking in person.
Through texting, you will be able to create visuals and ignite his fantasies.
You can do it by avoiding negative phrases or heavy topics such as religion or politics. Try to use memes, photos, or voice messages instead.
Also, based on this scientific research, using different media and technology has a positive impact on a relationship.
Using simple media will help you keep the language lighthearted and fun.
9. Don’t spill all your beans
If you reveal every little detail about your life, it might overwhelm him and
won’t be interested in continuing to talk.
Thus, you should show interest in him and put him on a pedestal while you continue to live your life.
It’s important to understand that you’re not dating exclusively yet, so you’re just getting to know one another.
For example, inform him that you’re hitting the gym at 10 am and then continue the conversation casually asking questions about his day.
10. Show in a subtle way how you can impact him positively
To make a guy like you over text, you should show genuine interest and impact his life for the better.
A guy can feel this, there’s no need to show it.
If you impact him positively over text, he’ll crave to come back each time more and more.
- Let him know that you’re thinking bout him or compliment him (not even for his physique).
- You might do it by telling him that you’ve heard a song that he has mentioned and reminded you of him.
- Be understanding and offer your help if you think that he needs something to support him, yet be careful and don’t overdo it.
11. Share something interesting about you and your life
The foundation of attraction over text is giving him a glimpse of your life and who you are.
You might do it while sharing an interesting fact about yourself, yet make sure that you’re not crossing your or his boundaries.
- Let him know about a funny experience from your childhood or high school.
- Share a silly or unusual event from your day (yet, make sure to avoid complaining or impacting him negatively).
Remember, that not everyone can open up and share bits of their life.
So, the dating coach Stephan Speaks advises you to be understanding, and transparent and not take it personally.
12. Avoid seeming too busy or hard to be chased
One thing that helps you to make a guy like you over texting is to respect him.
You shouldn’t ignore his text messages or leave him on read because this won’t make him chase you.
Playing hard to get will only give him the wrong message- he might think that you’re not interested in him.
So, to avoid this, you can mirror his texting habits and schedule. Try to adjust his boundaries with yours and vice versa.
How to give him butterflies over text?
You can give him butterflies and make him like you by creating flirty texts, showing your true intentions, and putting him on a pedestal.
It’s all about touching his heartstrings. So, here are a few text examples that you can use:
- 1. “I love the way that you made me laugh hard yesterday. My stomach still hurts.”
- 2. “You’re amazing. That’s it. That’s the text.”
- 3. “Just wanted to say that you’re very cool.”
- 4. “How was your day today? Hope you got promoted.”
- 5. “I’m drinking London Fog right now and it’s a bit bitter. Do you know what can I use instead of Sugar to make it sweeter?”
- 6. “Just wanted to let you know that you have a special way of explaining things. Love it.”
- 7. “Good morning. Hope you have a great day today.”
- 8. “We need a challenge to see which one’s sense of humor is better😝.”
- 9. “I’m sitting at Dunkin Donuts right now. I remembered your experience with Donuts and I cannot stop laughing again.”
- 10. “Can you guess what’s on my mind right now? The letter U 🤪.”
Don’t forget that the goal here is, to be honest with him and make him feel appreciated. Tell him subtly how positively he impacts you.
A few mistakes that you should avoid while getting a guy to like you over text!
While getting a boy to like you over text, you might tend to focus a lot on it and let that be your priority.
I am not implying that you should spare time to talk to him and give him your attention.
What I want to say is that you need to balance continuing your life and spare some time and space to text him.
1. You shouldn’t text more than he does. If you over-text then you’ll come across as needy.
Indeed, you might like this guy and want to let him know immediately.
But, if you constantly text him without giving him some time to enjoy himself on his own and process the situation, he might start to get annoyed.
2. Avoid hopping immediately to sexting. Before doing it try to learn if he likes it or not.
Usually, a man who is comfortable with sexting and doesn’t try to get to you more about you, he’s just looking for a fling.
3. Also, short and vague answers won’t make you look mysterious.
He will think that you’re not enjoying the conversation or you’re just talking with him to pass the time.
4. Don’t tend to ignore his behavior and intentions.
When you like a guy and want him to like you over text, you tend to focus only on that and ignore the RED FLAGS.
Sometimes, a guy who isn’t interested might reply to you shortly or will keep you stringing along.
There is also that type of guy that will be rude to you even though he might like you to some extent.
If he likes you then he’ll check up on you and he will treat you differently.
He might tease and flirt from time to time to attract you but not to belittle you or make you feel bad.
5. Don’t use too many metaphors or ambiguous words.
Using ambiguous words sometimes can help in continuing the conversation and making it more interesting.
Hence, if you constantly use a language that is not direct then he’ll get tired of decoding the hints.
6. Avoid being negative and complaining about not getting the wanted attention.
You shouldn’t be too aggressive when addressing your attention and intentions.
Try to have a more subtle approach. Focus on your life and let him enjoy your conversations and interact wherever he’s ready.
Also, don’t complain all the time and tell him about your problem. Making him feel bad about you won’t make him like you.
Remember that texting is all about keeping the conversation simple, fun, and positive.
The bottom line: How to get a guy to like you through text?
Getting a guy to like you through text is achievable the moment you’re honest, find common interests, and be confident and playful.
The main goal is to create a comfortable space for him where he can engage in the conversation and be himself.
A guy can open up and start to be attracted to you over text when you flirt, show interest in him, and initiate convos from time to time.
Pay attention to his replies and his language and try to adjust your texts to them.
Using the proper attitude will help you to create a special connection through text.
Best of luck,