You are dying inside to get a guy’s attention and you do not know how? Or let me set it this way, you tried some tips but yet nothing happened and it didn’t work out?
No worries, count on me! We’ll figure this out together in this article since there is just not one single rule, there are a few that should be followed to capture his attention.
If he is used to women always trying to impress him or get his attention, he will want something different, something that feeds the flame into him. We’ll learn exactly how to do that. But, before jumping to that, let me clarify this:
Is it easy to get a guy’s attention?
In other specific words: Is it challenging to attract the attention of the guy that you are interested in first?
Guys can be interested in you without you doing anything special in that direction, without even trying, perhaps you’re not even slightly interested in them, but you still end up getting their attention. Just like that.
During that time you’re just being yourself, and you don’t put much effort into it. You get them to like you.
So, it is easy and difficult at the same time. It is easy if your world doesn’t revolve around him. It is difficult if you think of it as an impossible task and you give all the energy to achieve it.
Do not set your life according to his preferences, life intentions, goals, or anything else. Try to get the attention of that type of guy that you think you can get a good connection with, the one who’d be the right one to date.
Once you know what you are looking for, capturing his attention process will be easy.
Sometimes he might be clueless that you want to get his attention; to make it much simpler, to capture his attention and be visible to him, here are 9 golden rules on how to get a guy’s attention for realsies!
1. Catch a glimpse of him: Make him feel some type of way
I know you may have heard about using your body language to attract attention. But, sometimes it may be difficult to put that into practice.
Your eyes will draw attention, he’ll notice that you’re noticing him. He’ll be curious. You have met this guy for the first time in your life at the bar, you are all smitten, now you want to be visible to him. How?
Use your eyes, yes, your eyes. Look at him once in a while, but do not stare. Just look gently. Do not stare at him for more than 3 or 4 seconds.
He will feel some type of way. As you are doing this movement, play with your hair easily, smile, and laugh with your friends. Do it naturally, a way of flirting, if you will.
If he is not interested and does not want to give you that type of attention it is better to not get obsessed over this whole situation.
2. Impress him in the first seconds: Be a bundle of joy
Is this the first time that you are meeting him or you have crossed paths suddenly at a cafe? If you are polite, nice, friendly, and have positive energy, this will catch his attention.
One thing that guys notice about you is your attitude and connection with others. It does not matter where you are, your attitude will be noticed at the same level as your appearance.
He can feel the type of energy that you have while interacting with other people; whether those people are your friends, someone you just met at that place, etc. Your energy and attitude towards others will reflect parts of your personality.
3. Introduce yourself, but don’t be a windbag
After flirting with him from afar, if he does not make the first move to get up and come to you, find a moment when he is alone and go introduce yourself.
You can ask for his help on something, or you can simply smile and say hi. Find a polite way to introduce yourself. Compliment him or comment on what he has chosen to drink or even on his style, in general.
When you initiate the conversation, be a good listener, do not be a windbag trying to get his attention, know how to keep the conversation going with him.
Yes, you can reveal some information about yourself but still do it wisely, let him interact with this information. Let him give his opinion on it too, let him express himself too, listen to him.
4. Be funny and know how to use your sense of humor
Have you been a part of an entourage and there is a guy you like and want his attention?
At the beginning of your conversation, I recommend using some ‘Lame Pick up Lines’ that will impact the continuity of the convo.
Yes, being all funny and having witty humor will make you outstanding. It will help you get him all hooked and connect with you.
Here, a few examples of funny things to say, which you can nail if you combine them with the right tone of voice and facial expression:
* Since we are talking about this terrible weather, I have wondered if you are called ‘Hurricane John’ since you are blowing my mind away.
* Pretend to have a phone call and then say: Omg, Vogue called me! They want to have you on the cover.
* Nice dance moves, can I copy them already. Or maybe you’ll teach me?
* Excuse me, sir, I have been watching you for some time now. I am afraid I have to arrest you for being too cute.
Use your authentic sense of humor; Though, do not overdo it since it will start to nag him and make him feel uncomfortable around you. Let it flow.
Humor will give you a fresh way to start and continue a conversation while having his attention.
5. Embrace your uniqueness, don’t be scared to be different
Let’s make him notice your uniqueness.
First, be creative: Have your style of dressing, talking, and walking. Be presentable and communicative!
Second, avoid being a drama queen/gossiping: It won’t work that way. Being a drama queen or gossiping about others or someone in particular in front of this guy, won’t capture his attention. On the contrary, it will draw him away from you.
Third, be confident, and embrace your independence: Being an independent woman, having a life, having confidence while ‘you’ve got you’; make you outstanding!
Fourth, love yourself and life. Be a positive little gem. Men’s attention is drawn to you by being all positive and full of life. If you are at the club and want to get up and dance, do it. Though, don’t go out of your way to catch his attention. It might get his attention, but not in a good sense.
6. Craft that art of Charm: Be a sexy and confident woman
Robert Greene conveys what a charmer should be and do:
“They deflect attention from themselves and focus it on their target. They understand your spirit, feel your pain, and adapt to your moods. In the presence of a Charmer, you feel better about yourself.”
Be a good listener when you are around him, talk about deeper topics, ask him interesting questions, look him into the eyes, nod in the meantime, smile at him. Shift your attention to him.
Enhance your charming skills while following these tips:
- Wear something nice, be presentable;
- Be in control of your presence;
- When you talk to him, do not judge him, try to reflect on what he is saying, add your opinion;
- See good in him, but be subjective;
- Be honest and laugh at yourself sometimes;
- Be straightforward and do not try hard to please him or anyone around you;
- Know how to criticize yourself and grow as an individual;
- Be a decision-maker.
So, charisma and being charming helps you shift his attention to you without having that passive-aggressive behavior.
7. Be a social butterfly and mingle with his entourage
One of the traits that draw a man’s attention is being friendly and bubbly. If you find yourself comfortable communicating and connecting with one (or more) of his friends then just be you, create a good vibe.
Through his friends, you will get the chance to meet him and pull his attention at you. If your friendship clicks then you are new to his entourage, he will want to know more about you.
8. Get his attention through text: be funny, flirty, mysterious
Let’s shift the situation now from wanting to attract his attention in-person to impressing him online.
While texting to get his attention, you should consider it as art and something fun to do.
Flirt with him through text. Though do not take it as a school task, do not think about the outcomes, since it will come out boring.
One thing that you should avoid is over-posting. Overposting and sharing a lot of personal things might add a desperate shade to you.
Being mysterious means not oversharing. Post things that make you feel comfortable. Do not post for him, do not consider him as the only audience.
Post something unique, a band, or a quote that you like. If he feels intrigued or interested, he will reply.
When texting, keep the conversation going with him. Make it fun, send him short texts, flirty ones, even some phrases that catch his eye and make him laugh.
9. Lastly, do not fight for his attention!
Not fighting for his attention is a way of applying reverse psychology to him.
While not fighting for a guy’s attention makes you immediately outstanding and more desirable.
Anyone can feel a forced vibe. So don’t try to force it. Originality will arouse his interest in you. Also, that doesn’t mean to act all cocky and not approachable, but to learn how not to seek merely the attention.
A guy will be more interested and curious about the girl who keeps talking when she thinks that is the proper time, engages in a conversation with a joke here and there because she feels like that.
Take this scenario: Capturing the attention of your boyfriend or husband
You know this guy, right? … your husband, or boyfriend? Who am I kidding with? Of course, you do! That is why the rules of the game change a little bit.
Here’s how to get your boyfriend or husband’s attention:
– Make him a surprise abruptly; buy him a little gift or book a trip just for you two;
– Organize a dinner for two to let him know how much you appreciate him;
– Give him attention too, try to help him in solving his problems;
– Focus on yourself, give him his space from time to time;
– Take your time to have a little distance; Go and take a trip on your own or with your friends;
– Keep that fire in the relationship and attract his attention by always being humble but setting your boundaries and standards.
After getting all these tips, the most valuable one is to distinguish these two:
Getting a guy’s attention vs Attention Seeker
While trying too much to get attention suddenly you seem and look desperate and act like an Attention Seeker.
Here are the basics of an attention seeker:
You overshare. In real life or social media (e.g. you post too many selfies, you text him too often on his socials, etc);
You play the drama queen. You raise your voice so he can hear you, or you post statuses about him, the forced vibe will be felt;
You adjust to his preferences: You become someone you’re not. Doesn’t matter where or when, the moment you change something about yourself (behavior, looks, taste, etc) because you want to catch his eye, you’re sort of in the attention seekers’ club.
Note: You may do this unconsciously, cuz’ your main goal is GETTING HIS ATTENTION. And you are not thinking about other outcomes. But doing will make it challenging to capture his attention like that.
The basics of getting a guy’s attention:
Looking him in the eyes. Helps in shifting attention to him, which then gets his attention shifted to you.
Being your true and beautiful self. When you are your true self and feel fulfilled then it’s easy to attract and get the attention of someone appropriate for you.
Not hiding your standards, your views on life, the reason why you are so confident about what you feel or think, is another way to be your true self.
Using your humor. Doing this is part of being yourself, use your sense of humor, make him laugh.
Not overdoing things. Trust me, being always on his face, texting him constantly, bragging about yourself, dressing in something that is not in your style, changing for him… Will never be a golden ticket to attract his attention!
FAQ – Mirror, mirror on the wall how can I attract his attention at all?
1. How to act if you don’t get his attention on the first attempt?
If you don’t get his attention on the first attempt, don’t be discouraged. Don’t go out of your way to get his attention. Reflect on yourself, be patient, and just take it easy.
Keep in mind that some guys have it hard understanding the signs of flirting or making him know that you are interested in him.
Try to reflect where it went wrong, it is not the end of the world. Most importantly try to work on yourself, set your standards, don’t try to force it.
2. What’s the best way to attract MEN?
Is there one exact way to attract him? No, there isn’t ‘just one way’ but the most important thing to capture his attention is by being yourself, being original.
I have elaborated throughout the article that being ‘Different’ or original is the secret of getting a guy’s attention.
But, you must know whose attention you want to get. If he is someone that is not your type, he is the one that seeks other types of women. Nothing will work to get his attention. You can tell by his vibe if it is going to click or not.