How often you should text or call your partner when in a long-distance relationship depends on a few elements.
The first one is his personality and text habits. Then your contact depends on your communication skills and how much you like/love one another.
Some people find it natural to text and make calls during the day, while others may have a different approach to it.
Without further ado, you will find 9 tips to know how often and when you should text in a long-distance relationship:
1. First talk about the frequency
Best way to figure out when how often the frequency of your text messages, is one that you both agree on, depending on each other requirements.
Work or uni, whatever the reason for the distance plays a big role in decision-making.
You need to create a common ground where both you and your partner agree on a communication pattern that works for you.
Without having this conversation, confusion and misunderstandings are likely gonna occur when long-distance.
To avoid that, you can also consider getting help from licensed therapists, a great way to start is Relationship Hero.
2. If your partner is the clingy type and needs constant attention
Constantly texting and giving each other updates is what they are after.
To them, it seems a necessary and most secure way of keeping the spark in the relationship flowing.
So, rent to them about anything and everything, things you ate, the dream you had, people you saw, and how many times you laughed that day.
Knowing when and respecting each other’s time and schedule is important here.
If this is what they need, it is better to have a talk and discuss to find the perfect balance between life and the relationship.
3. If you can rarely meet in person
If the distance between you and your partner is significant, such as living on different continents, then the best solution is texting every day.
There are other ways besides texting and calling to make long distance more fun, one way is through Netflix party watch.
That way you enjoy your virtual cinema date, which is something easy and enjoyable for both you and your partner.
This doesn’t necessarily mean texting nonstop or updating your every breath, but at the very least, good morning or a catch-up phone call at night.
According to Patrick Cheathan, keeping contact is mandatory to put in the work for a long-distance relationship to thrive.
4. If your long-distance partner hates texting
Some people find texting to be a difficult task that they dread, but when in a long-distance relationship, not communicating enough can lead to problems.
While one partner might not enjoy it, the other will see it as a necessary act of love that will help them feel close no matter the distance.
Neither of these preferences is good or bad, but it is important to understand each other’s needs and what fulfills them.
I for instance made it clear what I want beforehand, I tell them I want a Facetime call every night if not busy.
5. Consider if your partner is the jealous type
If your partner is a jealous type, they may demand more texting on a daily than what is considered normal.
They wanna know where you stay, and who you are with, facetime calls every few hours.
Or when you are not replying, he could be thinking you are doing something you should not, hence cheating with another.
Their fear that you are cheating, is often caused by insecurity, which can lead to your partner thinking you are being unfaithful.
If your partner’s constant texting is becoming something of a distraction and interferes with your work, uni, or social life, tell them right away.
If your partner is mature, they will understand your concerns and make an effort to change their behavior for the better.
6. If your partner has a busy schedule
Maintaining a relationship when you are in a long-distance plus a day occupying job, can be hard to maintain.
Both partners need to make up some time of their day, for at least a quick phone call.
The point here is, even if you are not able to meet in real life, you still get to have an online date and see each other’s faces.
Facetime once a day is enough to stay connected, so make time for it and agree on a decision that works for both.
7. When you want to ignite the flame
For some couples, fulfilling their sexual needs can be a key challenge when doing long distance.
Struggles may arise when you enjoy regular sex more often, and this gets hard to deal with.
Although there are ways to achieve that even when in a long-distance relationship:
- Phone sex is a great way to tease stuff up when you wanna get down.
- Exchanging sexy Snapchat, but make sure they are secure and private.
- Finding nasty things you would love to do to each other in the bedroom.
If you feel that none of this information doesn’t work to ignite the flame, try to work with a therapist that knows how to deal with LDR specifically.
8. When you’re getting to know one another: The courtship period
At the beginning of the relationship is important to build attraction.
And if you’re just getting to know one another then it’s important to text at least once a day.
A good morning or goodnight text can make a huge difference. You will show that you’re interested in him and you want to keep the flame alive.
Even in this scenario, you shouldn’t always initiate texts and craft long messages.
Be simple. Text a few times and shortly.
Because if you overdo it this will just push him away because when being far from another doesn’t mean that you should lovebomb him.
9. When you’ve been in LDR for a long period
When you’ve been in a long-distance relationship for more than 3 years then the intensity of texts and calls changes.
It doesn’t mean that you’re losing interest.
It means that you’re already familiar with one another and keep communicating with one another enough to know that you care.
Now, that the attraction is built, the quality of texts matters and not the quantity.
Now, it’s important what you ask him and what type of attention you give to him.
So, it doesn’t mean that you should text daily, in this case, to show that you’re into him.
Texting rules when in a long-distance relationship: What types of mistakes should you avoid?
Naturally, there are no rules in texting, just the ones you make together.
However, for some people, texting can be a challenge, especially in long-distance relationships.
They may fear the relationship will become boring or get tired of each other.
- Keep the texts sweet and interesting;
- Don’t hide anything from them;
- Try to be vulnerable;
- Give them the sexual needs they have;
- Send each other gifts to spike up the relationship;
- Don’t try to ignore his texts because being in LDR will only make him even more confused when you don’t reply to him;
- Let him initiate texts too;
- Don’t text just to avoid calling him;
In general, texting in long-distance should feel like a soft breeze that is keeping you warm while not being near each other.
It shouldn’t feel like an obligation or like a contest that who is going to win the prize of the best partner.
In conclusion: How often do you text in a long-distance relationship?
You text in a long-distance relationship enough to keep a healthy relationship.
That means that you communicate whenever is convenient for both of you.
If both of you have a busy schedule then you should create a schedule that would be appropriate for both of you.
Sometimes even a simple text before sleeping can make his day.
Keep it going!