I was thinking the other day: most of us like to be liked, but how many of us have the guts to show someone else they’re liked, or appreciated, or admired?
There’s beauty in making a person feel and know that they’re seen, they’re visible, and admired. I find even more beauty on the people who take up the courage to express admiration and appreciation. I suppose I find beauty in people like you, in your courage, and uniqueness.
How to tell a guy you have feelings for him? – A few things to reflect on
Communicating your interest doesn’t mean that you’re desperate.
Don’t see it as a woman communicating her feelings and interest to a man. See it as a human communicating to another human.
I believe that being straightforward, and expressing your feelings freely is the opposite of desperate, it is powerful.
Let go of fear, embrace honest communication, and embrace braveness.
Fear holds you back to some of the most amazing and interesting experiences. Fear will make you focus more on the response you might get from him, it’ll consume a bit of your energy.
Try to let go of that fear by focusing more on how you’re going to tell him that you like him. How to come from a place of confidence, self-appreciation, and mood independence towards his answer.
Let go of the stigma.
Traditionally men are the ones to make the first move. Thankfully a woman asking a man out, or proposing, or asking a man’s number is not so scandalous anymore. However, part of us is still holding on to that, since it’s been ‘installed’ in our heads that making the first move is for men. Yes, ever since we were little girls.
Uninstall that idea from your head, and go make the first move with confidence and power that you own so very well!
Is it a good idea to tell him I like him?
“Should I tell a guy I like him?” Yes, yes you should. Reasons? Put the seatbelt on!
1. Breaking the standards it’s a freeing experience.
Society often puts us within certain frames from which, at times, is very difficult to escape from. One of those being “Men should always take the lead. They’re made to chase!”.
You’ll screw that partially made-up law, that for some reason most of the people follow it without having a clue why.
You’ll break that standard, escape that suffocating frame, and feel free to do something that not everyone has the balls to do. Pat yourself on the shoulder.
2. It’ll make an awesome memory that’ll remind you of your courage.
I mentioned earlier how not everyone has the courage to break such norms. Well, you have enough courage, and this will be the perfect memory to remind you of that.
As long as you can learn something from it, you can get at least one positive thing out of it, then why not do it?
3. You’re letting someone know they’re seen. Of course it is a good idea!
I don’t care what his response will be. I know one thing for sure, he will feel seen. You’re letting him know of that, you’re showing him.
You’re one of the few that are brave and authentic to come out and make the first move.
I’ll let you answer your question: Should you tell him you like him?
How do you tell a guy how you feel about him?
Well, acknowledging your feelings is an amazing thing to do. Communicating them to someone is even more amazing when done right.
If you look at it from a different perspective, it can get pretty plain and simple. It’s two people communicating openly, and with honesty.
Here’s your answer to “How do I tell a guy how you feel about them?”
1. Men don’t really understand indirect communication, hence being direct about it could be the best option.
Us women like to give hints to them, on the other hand men are completely clueless, and then we get mad for them not understanding us, and then we hold grudges to them, and they STILL don’t understand which makes us even more mad…
How on earth do we solve this? Well, men can be a little more understanding of our sensitivity, and we can be a little more understanding of the fact that they can’t read between the lines.
So, telling a guy how you feel about him directly, without playing games is the best option. Direct enough not to scare him away, and direct enough to make him understand. It’s important to find a balance, and not overdo the ‘confession’.
2. Give him space, don’t push him on the corner.
This connects to the point I made for not overdoing the ‘confession’. You want to give him space, you don’t want to suffocate him with how much you like him, how excited you are to let him know about it.
I’m not saying to suppress what you’re feeling, I’m saying you should find the right way to communicate what you’re feeling for the type of person. Otherwise, it wouldn’t make sense.
In other words, take your time to process what you’re feeling, and don’t put pressure on him about it.
Let’s say you told him you like him. Now you don’t want to just sit and stare at his face for his reaction, or ask him for a response. Be more relaxed, give space, and don’t make pressure.
3. Be playful.
This is something beautiful to share, no matter how things go. So you don’t want to make it dramatic and serious.
Approach him with a relaxed and playful attitude. You’re free, you’re confident, you’re lovely, you know it, and you’re ready to express something most people hesitate to express.
Playfulness is pretty, beautiful, and flowing. You embrace those, because you enjoy the state you’re in, you’re confident, and you’re not fearing the outcome, the response.
4. Find the right timing & the right place
Time and place play an important role in this. As long as it happens naturally, and as long as it flows from a place of confidence and good intentions, it is perfect.
BUT, it is also important to pay attention to some details, and think of them beforehand. Okay, let’s sort this through together, shall we?
The wrong timing:
– Him being busy.
– Him talking to someone else.
– Him being surrounded by friends.
The wrong place:
– A very loud place, where you have to repeat yourself.
– A very quiet place, where there’s potential for an uncomfortable silence.
In other words, you don’t want something/someone to interrupt your speech, but also you don’t want the long silence that makes you both feel uncomfortable after you’ve finished your speech.
5. Ask him to hang out.
(i.e. spend more time with you)
If you don’t feel comfortable, and if it doesn’t come natural to you to go to him and tell him how you feel directly, then simply ask him to hang out. It can even not be a date.
Just a cup of coffee to get to know one another better. Then, you can see if you like him or not, or you can read his body language, and his way of communicating to you to see if the feelings are reciprocated.
At the end of the day, you might just win a good friend instead of a potential partner. And at the end of the day, there’s nothing wrong with that. AND at the end of the day, finding a partner doesn’t have to necessarily be a priority.
Don’t try to force things to happen, instead try to enjoy things and experiences as they come and exactly how they come.
6. Avoid playing mind games, and be as honest as possible.
We are giving signs that others accept unconsciously, but we are also receiving such signs unconsciously. So you can either feel it in your gut that he likes you back, or you can try to read the signs of his body language.
It’s important that you’re honest and genuine. You like him, perhaps he likes you back, perhaps not, and finding out which is which through mind games and tricks is not the best way to go.
You’re probably thinking of the wonderful things you can do together to start a relationship later on…
Starting and building up a relationship through mind games, tricks on “how to make him obsessed with you” will lead to starting and building an unhealthy relationship (whatever it may turn out: a romantic relationship, or plainly a friendship).
7. Know a bit about him, and where he is at life.
I’m not talking about stalking him to find out everything you can, no. Just see if you can find any information about him, like whether he has a girlfriend, or his sexual preferences, and other things that might help you in deciding whether you want to tell him or not.
If you already talk to him, and know him a bit, it’ll be easier to find out through a simple conversation about life, family, job, or relationships. Have a sincere, honest, and open approach.
My point is, to have an understanding of the odds of him being available, or suitable for a relationship (or whatever else it is that you’re looking for in him).
8. Let him know you’re cool with it despite what his response may be.
Accept whatever answer you get, accept it from a place of peace and calm. Your way of communicating should let this be obvious to him. You can, however, tell him straightly and directly that his response will not affect you dramatically, and that you’re okay with whatever response he gives.
This correlates to what I wrote above: give him space, & don’t put pressure on him.
Such an approach leaves room for a more honest response, and not a forced one. It’s something you’re doing for joy and good times, not for something that requires black suits and serious faces on. This should reflect on the conversation you have together.
9. Don’t f/take it back.
The tendency to get very defensive once receiving a ‘negative’ response is understandable too. However, it is a much more healthy way of responding, if you don’t take what you said back, instead you respect their space, your acknowledged feelings, and own it.
Some even fake it, by saying something like “Haha, I was just messing around with you!”, or “I lost a bet and I had to do this, I’m sorry for putting you in such a position.”
I would highly not recommend that! Own it. I even see it as a powerful place to be in. You’re not pulling back, you respect someone’s space and response, and by doing that, you gracefully respect yours too.
10. Decide whether you’d like to tell him in person, or through text.
Well, some of us are confident enough to show/tell someone of our admiration for them through text, and some in person. Both ways are acceptable, and doable.
I’ll let you know how to do it in both ways, and I’ll explain what are the positives and the negatives of each:
How to tell a guy you like him in person? – Tips, examples & advice
Telling him you like him in person will save you the impatient waiting for a reply back while overthinking what you texted him.
It is understandable and human to feel nervous and/or anxious about approaching someone and straight up telling them you like them. Especially for us women that have been taught from childhood the very opposite thing of what we’re about to do right now: it’s a man’s duty to take the lead.
You want to find a way to tell him you like him without scaring him off, and (in my opinion) most importantly, to find a way to tell him you like him without scaring yourself off. Let’s see what we can do about it:
1. Practice if needed: be confident
When you’re confident under your skin, when you’re confident with what you are, accepting of what you represent and how you think, you glow. You shine so bright that every move of you shows confidence, and positive energy.
To me, confidence is accepting yourself. Embracing exactly what you are, and exactly how you are. Embracing that you can improve. Not comparing yourself to others, being comfortable and okay with the flow of things that run through your head. Accepting your human needs and capricious moods.
I want you to shine, I want you to glow when you finally approach him. And I don’t want that light and brightness to dim for a second, no matter what reaction you get from him.
2. Keep it casual and not too dramatic
To keep it so, you have to feel it so. Understanding that this is not one of the things your life depends on, nor is it one of the things that’ll ruin/fix something crucial in your life will help you feel that this is not so dramatic after all.
You’re packed up with confidence, glow, and a good, beautiful heart, you won’t lose anything from doing this. You’ll make a memory, to which you’ll look back after some time, and be thankful either way it went through.
Relax, don’t stress – You’re doing something fun and amazing! It’s going to be a memory, it’s not that dramatic. Keep it that way.
3. Look damn fine (with a twist)
Cheerful, joyful, and easy-going. Wear whatever clothes you feel comfortable in, wear whatever jewelry you wish to wear. This is how you look damn fine, right?
Looking damn fine can have millions of different meanings to all of you. As long as you’re comfortable, and you’re yourself, you’ll be good to go. Actually, not good, you’ll be amazing to go.
I read some advice that you have to pay extra attention to your looks that day, but they didn’t quite put it out the way I liked them to put it. I’m tired of reading ‘famous’ advice to look pretty, and to ‘pay extra attention to your looks that day’.
As long as you feel comfortable, as long as you’re your true self, you’re pretty, you’re glowing, always.
4. Prepare yourself for two different answers you might get
Well, we are already aware of that: he will react and respond in a certain way, right?
He will say something that means he likes you too, something that means he, unfortunately, doesn’t like you back, or something that leaves you confused about what it means.
Prepare yourself for each case. Try to imagine yourself in each position, and think of a reasonable response for each (I’ll give you a hand on this later in the article).
5. Walk up to him and tell him
This is the part where you straight up tell him.
A friendly reminder: make sure that he’s not with his friends/colleagues, etc. You want to be alone with him in order to build connection, to not have distractions, and feel more free to communicate.
What I’d suggest you to do is, tell him something like:
“Hi my name is Clara! We haven’t been introduced before, and I just wanted to let you know that I find you very attractive.”
“Hello, I’m Kate, we haven’t met before. I noticed you were looking at me, so I thought I’d let you know that I find your eyes very charming. And you, I find YOU very charming.”
“Hello, you caught my eye a few times before. I don’t believe we were introduced before. Hi, I’m Tiara!”
Obviously, these are helpful to use if you’re strangers to one another.
With an inviting smile on, with an undeniable confidence… Lord have mercy!!
After saying any of these, walk away to mind your own business. You don’t want to stay there and just stare while waiting for an answer. Walk girl, walk!
Now the ball will be on his court, and it’ll be up to him to make the next move.
However, if he’s a friend, or just someone you know and have conversations every now and then, you can say like this:
“Daniel, I enjoy and like spending time with you, as a matter of fact I like you!”
“I like you, Ben. You’re so kind and caring, and I truly do admire those qualities in a person.”
“Well, well, well… someone’s looking really handsome in that blue shirt today!!”
You can do one of those lines, or something around there depending on how open you two communicate with one another.
With confidence, a smile on your face, I’m sure you’re going to pull this off gracefully.
Telling a guy you like him over the phone – Can I tell him I like him over text?
Yes. Yes you can tell him you like him over text. It would’ve been more dramatic some years ago, but now most things are done through technology, and relationships & dating make no exception. And, who knows, he might just be waiting for you to text him!
The next question is, how to tell a guy you like him over text?
Telling him you like him online, can be easier for you if you know that you wouldn’t feel the most comfortable telling him in person.
So, here it goes: How do I tell a guy I like him over text?
We’re going to start with the basics and more direct ways, to the ones that give him hints/clues that someone out there likes them. Good news, eh?
1. Be direct, or start a conversation.
You can directly send him a text that says something like:
“Hi Ben, it’s Bernadette from [name of workplace/class/activity]. I find you very attractive. I’d love to get to know you more!”
“I like your paintings, and even more the effort you put into their details. Besides your paintings, I also like you :)”
“I couldn’t help but notice you at the dance class. I had to tell you: I find you very handsome.”
2. Text him first, ask him how his day has been.
It’s a sign of interest towards him. You can send something as simple as:
“Hi Tim. How have you been?”
You can send him something more extra if you’re feeling bold that day. However, I’d like you to keep in mind to not overdo this texting him first thing.
Pay attention to his reciprocation. See if he’s into the idea of texting with you, or if he ever thinks of texting you too sometimes, try to find clues he likes you through text.
There are plenty of ways to ask a guy out through text. The key is to not be scared, to be confident, and go for it. Seriously.
You can send him something like:
“Hi Justin, I have an extra ticket for [a movie he didn’t stop talking about for one second]. If you feel like seeing it at the [cinema name] this Friday, you can totally come with me!”
Giving him a call to tell him you like him
I wouldn’t suggest this one. But if your butterfly-like soul feels like doing it, you absolutely can.
Here’s how I suggest you do it:
Step one: Call him.
Step two: Start a conversation.
Step three: Just casually smiling tell him something like “I like you Bernard. I like how you take your time to do things”.
Just say something like that, and let the rest flow naturally, without putting much energy into how and what could happen next.
How do I let a guy know I like him without actually telling him?
I gathered my colleagues about this one, and they confirmed it to me: There’s a way that most women who are trying to ‘confess’ find it easier, and that is telling a guy they like him without actually telling him.
1. Be kind to him
Random little things, not grand openings. It can be as little as helping him to download an app on his phone.
Even though kindness doesn’t necessarily mean someone likes you romantically. It is something that comes naturally, don’t hold it in. Be kind to him.
2. Flirt (but not overdo it)
Make it light flirting, not the one that makes you want to leave the room. Look at him with your lovely eyeballs, and smile every now and then. A gentle melting smile.
You can pay an honest compliment, one that’s not over done and sincerely thought.
You can give him a light touch on his arm when he says something kind, or sweet. Make eye contact with him when doing this. It helps in building the connection between you two. Hug him a little longer if you feel like it.
Note
Do this only if it comes naturally. Not because you have to. Don’t force yourself into doing things you don’t feel like doing. Ever!
3. Ask him to help you out on something
ONLY IF YOU NEED HIS HELP. Let’s understand that.
Men like being needed, and women don’t really need a lot of what they have to offer, but when we like them, we start accepting the help. What?
Little things like, helping you out with something with your phone, or computer, or just a question on something he knows, but you’re not understanding.
Once he helps you out, you can give him a little compliment followed by sweet eye contact, and a sweet smile that’s meant to melt hearts.
Note
For god’s sake, don’t ask him to help you with the groceries!
4. Invite him to an event you’re going, not necessarily a date
You’re chill and everything, and you just invite him to something interesting you’re going with friends, or with people you don’t know.
Be polite and respectful to whatever his answer is.
5. A little gift – Be thoughtful
Perhaps he’s been wanting to get this book, or movie for the longest time, but didn’t really have time to. You can get it for him.
Don’t go all crazy on this. A little something that shows you’re thoughtful. That makes him go “Oh, what if she likes me?”
6. Ask him out
A cup of coffee, a movie, a glass of wine, or even dinner. Whatever you feel comfortable with. It is an indirect way of telling him “Jackson, I like you!”
Think of a place you’d like to go with him, and get to know him better. Somewhere you feel comfortable, somewhere you feel safe, and free to express yourself as you are.
What happens when you tell a guy you like him? – Responding back to his response/s
So, as I told you earlier in the article, there are three ways through which he could respond:
1. A response that indicates he likes you back.
Which is amazing news! We’re excited, we’re cool about it, and we respond back with something like:
“Oh, that’s lovely to hear/know! I’m actually very happy!”
“I’m very happy this is mutual. I’d love to know more about you.”
“I knew it! Haha, it’s lovely to know that, really.”
With a warm and glowing smile on your face that reflects to him honesty and sincerity, but not obsessiveness.
2. A response that indicates he doesn’t like you back.
Not the best news, but definitely manageable news. We’re calm, we’re peaceful, the light and glow didn’t dim, we respond:
“Ok, I understand. Though, I’m okay with still being friends.”
“I understand you. Thanks for sharing time to listen to me.”
“Thank you for being honest. I really do appreciate it.”
Don’t forget, you’re still smiling from within and out, because there’s nothing wrong with such a response. Your life goes on, baby girl.
3. A response that doesn’t really indicate anything & leaves you confused.
Confusing news, understandable though, slightly difficult to manage. We’re confused, yet peaceful, and we respond:
“It was lovely talking to you. See you some other time, then.”
“I have to go now. Thanks for sharing your time though.”
“I don’t have a clear understanding of what you meant by that, but it’s ok. I have to go now, I’m sorry. See you some other time I suppose.”
With a gorgeous confidence, a gorgeous unshakable smile, you gracefully nailed this!
How to tell him you love him? – Five different scenarios & 16 ways to do it right
FAQ
How to tell a guy you like him in a cute way?
A cute way is your authentic original way of telling him. However, a sticky note on his desk, or a message, or a not overdone compliment, can be the general cute ways of letting him know you like him.
How to tell a guy you like him without getting rejected?
Unless you’re 100% sure he likes you back, there’s no way of doing this that’ll make you 100% sure that you won’t be rejected.
Start from a place in which you know that there’s nothing wrong with being rejected. A face with a smile, a place of confidence and joy, and you’ll be just fine.
Good luck!!
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