By runawaybride_2 | Mar 10 2016
I am writing because I need advice for how to handle the predicament I am in. I am engaged, and have been in a relationship with my fiance for 3 years. We have a great time together, he is the sweetest and most considerate person in the world, he loves me and would do anything for me. Our families get along great and everything seems to be perfect. We have an exciting sex-life, albeit not as exciting as 2 years ago. We both have great careers and have the same future goals. The only area where we don't mesh is the fact that I'm a hopeless dreamer, someone who always wants to be fulfilled spiritually and who is always looking for inner peace, and can never find it. My fiance doesn't have that desire, and it's not something we talk about. After all, it's difficult to explain when I don't necessarily know what it is that I am searching for.
We are planning the last details for our wedding in a few months, and the closer the wedding date comes, the more terrified I am. I have found that talk of the wedding gives me knots in my stomach, makes me feel trapped and makes me lose attraction and devotion to my fiance. I have never cheated on him, but I have noticed that I've started noticing other guys more and I have a strong urge to be with someone else sexually and passionately, it's almost like I am planning how and with whom to do it. I can't get it out of my head, it consumes me and I have no idea how to bring it up to my fiance - or if I even should. He would be heartbroken. The idea of losing him and not being with him is equally as scary to me, if I ever saw him with another woman I would be heartbroken too.
I can easily imagine a life where we don't get married and where I am free to explore myself and what life has in store for me. I have a much harder time imaging myself as someone's wife, someone's mother and someone who has everything mapped out. But where we are currently; everything is planned and paid for, guests are invited to our destination wedding, and it seems like pulling it is impossible, and I don't even know if I want to.
I should say I am 29 years old, and this is the first really long relationship I've had. I've dated guys for longer periods, but never with the amount of commitment in my current relationship. I cry every day, and my fiance is noticing that I'm affected, but he thinks it's just wedding jitters and that everything will be fine. It might just be wedding jitters, I don't know. I used to be excited about our engagement, but I dread everything about it now. I don't want to be married, it feels like I'm walking voluntarily into a prison. But I also don't want to lose my fiance, whom I adore wholeheartedly.
By lavender_2 | Mar 19 2015
"I am hoping you are well and everything is OK" - 10 days after a break up via e-mail. Why to check on me if you dumped me?
By pisces_lover | Mar 16 2015
Do you feel he might be attracted towards me?
By pilt | Jan 30 2015
in our late 30s, he says s not prepared 4 marriage but says we will some day.
By allie_4 | Nov 25 2014
Apologies in advance because it's a long story. He & I were best friends for years before we finally got together. In the beginning it was great because we already had the foundation of the relationship. I'm in my late twenties & he's in his thirties & we both have steady jobs in good careers. For the first few months he called & texted everyday & we talked about the future & joked about how many kids we'd have, etc. He works 4hours away but we both travelled back & forth depending on who had more time off. Then things started to change. He got stressed with work & started to call less & less until everything started to take precedence over us. I called him on it & we argued until he apologised & said it wouldn't happen again, which it didn't, for a month. Lately he's been abroad a lot, 3 or 4 times in the past few months. When he's gone he barely calls or texts & blatantly ignores all my calls. I get mad at him & send him a horrible message & then he comes home all apologies & promises. Then I found an engagement ring at his place. He was out at the time & I said nothing & waited. That was about two months ago. He's abroad again, claiming someone is sick this time, ignoring all my calls but texting every few days saying how sorry he is & how much he misses me & how much I mean to him. He was supposed to come home last week but text a few hours before he was due back & said he couldn't make & that he'd call me that night...he didn't.
By fk1219 | Nov 14 2014
Here's the rest of the message: "but if we miss each other more than words can say and have this overwhelming feeling that we are losing what could be the most valuable person of our lives then we can put 100% into our relationship and see where we should go for our honeymoon, of course after talking to your parents :)"
I realize that the answer seems obvious, as Ive only seen this guy for two weeks, but maybe I'm wrong?? He's also divorced with a kid
By blessing | Nov 03 2014
By bethany19 | Oct 15 2014
My boyfriend will never let me pay for anything, I know this shouldn't bother me but it does. For a while I let him know it irritated me and we got into a couple disagreements about it but I came to the conclusion that its his money and he should know what he can afford more than I can.
I was texting him about something great that happened to me and his response was that he would need to take me out to this expensive restaurant that he had taken to me for our six month anniversary (yes I know but he's never had a girlfriend before and it was fun :P). I asked him not to and his response was that he knew when to pick his battles and "besides, have to save up for the 1 year right?"
I told him that if he had to save up for it I didn't want it and that I knew I was being a hypocrite since he had said the same to me a while ago. He just makes more money than me though so of course I have to save up to go out. His response is what confused me " not saving up, just putting a few dollars aside. for that and other things I need to focus on."
By lifeisaride | Jul 13 2014
I have been with my boyfriend for over a year. He has asked me to marry him numerous times but after a month he relapses into his old ways and takes off and I don't hear from him for a week and only be email. In his emails he always states how sorry he is for leaving like that and states how much his heart hurts when he thinks if us not being together. I know he's done this exact thing in every relationship and takes off on his friends and family. The last couple if times he has been staying with a woman who allows him to do what he wants and is sleeping with her. I know he has nowhere else to go which is part of the reason I take him back but it kills me every time. This last time I'm finding it hard to cope and could really use some insight into why he's doing this. He went away for a month and a bit and wrote to me daily and know he hasn't spoke to her. He claims he loves me and he gets physically ill when he thinks of us not being together but can't stop this need of going back to his old habits.
By gryphondork7 | Jun 16 2014
So for the past to days I've been hooking up with this guy. This guy happens to be 25 with two kids and a fiancé... I'm 16... My best friend considers him her brother because they are so close...
By harleyquinnbang | Jun 06 2014
I am 17 and I'm engaged. recently I had to move in with my dad and my fiancé has Ben getting mad that we won't be able to see each other as much anymore. i have to listen to my dad and participate in family activities otherwise I won't be able to see him at all and he says i don't care but he doesn't think of what will happen after I do something. I'm made out to be the bad guy when it's not in my control. all we do is argue lately. I haven't Ben able to text my fiancé as much. I know he's mad but it's out of my control.
By katiedid | May 11 2014
By dolly_2 | Apr 29 2014
We know eachother from almost 6 years. I been liking (loving!) him since then, but cuz of some reasons he portrayed a bad image of me. It's not his fault its an obvious reaction for my stupidity. We had lots of ups and downs in our friendship, he knows that i love him and that love is infinite, because he's my first love. He has always respected this feeling and never misused me for anything, but we were never have been together maybe because im not of his type, god knows. the most weirdest thing is that he shares everything with me, he had got engaged to a girl two years back. I was deeply hurted but still loved him, but few monthd after their engagement his finance dumped him for her ex. i wonder how could that girl make up her mind and heart to leave such a lovable guy's hand! its her badluck anyways, he was really upset about it but he didn't tell anyone else about it except me. This is already going to be a long story so im cutting it short to the last 1 month's scene. i had started preparing his birthday E-card 2 months before his birthday because i wanted it to be special, i guess he thought ihave forgotten his birthday so he texted me night before his birthday just for a casual talk. Next day when i sent him the ecard, he was like ty so much mam ( i have no idea why does he keep calling me mam these days?!) he said nowadays people hardly remember me, i said they gotta teach me how to forget you! he replied haha tell me you love me
me: its easy to say it u know but what happens next is scary (because i was expecting bad reaction if i tell him)
and then he said i need to stop being a raccoon and tell him everything, but then we moved to other topic
he texted so many sweet things that night and even kept that ecard as his display picture, all his relatives and friends could see it! we talked 2-3 times after that night , One convo went all about his fangirls who wanna be his gf, he's really handsome and rich thats why those girls keep flirting with him, (im not like one of them) I just said im jealous (because thosr girls could flirt with him and i can't! ) he said don't be jealous , its not a good thing :) then we Changed topic, A guy was bugging me from few days so i told him to tell him to stop, and he did. So he asked me if he's still bugging me i said no, then he was like good, fuck you thankless people. :P i replied even hundreds of thanks are less, he said no worries you can send me thousand kisses i don't mind :P
me: lol virtual kisses
so finally you understand the meaning of virtual
that's what iam, a fucking phone and computer
me:no you arent
he:yeah it is.
me:no its not
and the end, we texted one more time after this but just 1-2 texts thats it , ive been spending sleepless nights because he gave me diabetes with his sweet talks
By jessyjaymes | Apr 22 2014
So I was dating this guy for over a year. We have had our ups and downs but have always come back to each other and worked it out. Recently he finally said he was done with our fighting and has become very distant. In the mean time I have noticed him becoming closer with a friend (female) so close that he had her staying with him until she got a restraining order on her husband. Seemed kinda fishy since he never mentioned me to her. Also planned to ask me to married him twice in one week then the next week is when he just grew further apart.