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He texted me: "How about Saturday afternoon and then a casual dinner?" I replied 90mins later:"I just left you a voice message but it cut me off" and than 15mins after that I texted "Leaving work now. I am FREE on Sat. I do not have to go to the Music Hall as I said in my voice message. I am really looking forward to spending time with YOU." this was all at 4:30pm and now 9am next morning still have not heard anything from him

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Is he really just too busy with his kids...

By beay | Feb 21 2015

Hi,I am a 47year old female,just divorced after years of separation,and I recently met a guy online..he's into the same music as me,which made me very happy,as it's hard to find guys in their 40s who like the stuff I like. We started texting,no strings attached was the initial idea. Then he was the one who said we get on so well, that no strings attached may not be enough. I was quite happy to hear that,so I agreed. He kept texting me at random times during the working day with little sweet things like ''get out of my head I need to work,lol'' or ''hey,are u ok'' Then we met up. On the second date we couldn't keep our hands off each other and had sex. On the third date I went to his house and we did it again. He texted the next day ''thanks for an amazing night''..and since then he only texts me sporadically, and now it has got to the stage where if I don't text first, I probably won't hear from him for days. A bit of background info, he is in the process of divorce,but gets on really well with his ex,which isn't a problem for me as I am the same with my ex. He also has two kids, who he spends almost every weekend with. I want to see him again, but I don't want to be appear needy or clingy. I do text him, and he always responds (eventually)..but I would like to know if it's worth wasting my feelings on this guy. I have asked him to let me know if I get on his nerves or text too much, and he keeps saying Stop worrying, but he doesn't seem to initiate any more dates. I have texted a couple of times ''fancy coming up'' or shall we grab a coffee at the weekend, but he's kinda vague and just says ''I'll have to wait and see what kids arrangements are''.and then he doesn't really mention it again..I am getting a bit too worried,and keep checking my phone, and wind up disappointed...but we are so compatible, or so I thought. What should I do? Does it sound as if he just wanted sex after all? Could it be that he just doesn't think about me that much, but when I text he's happy enough? Is it the old case of He's just not that into me?? I am just so confused, as it was him who said we get on so well..Thank you for your advice, be brutal please.

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What to do?? I'm so confused.

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What is his deal...

By eswain | Jan 22 2015

So two weeks ago, I ask my coworker if we could hang out. He asks me to lunch, and I said sure. We were still on, until I started talking about my husband, whom I'm divorcing.

He backs away fast and asks if it could a group thing...that same day, we admitted we like each other.

But then, he declines the other people I invited. His reason; he's busy with college this semester as he's suppose to graduate in May.

Okay. So, I'm working through my divorce, and in the midst of talking to him, I get caught by a manager last night. I'm not suppose to goof off and talk to anyone not doing work.

I'm quite upset at how I make effort to see him, possibly getting in trouble.

So, is he just playing me off because I'm getting a divorce? And in the picture, what does he mean by "If our situations were different, there wouldn't be a problem,"

Btw, he admitted to me never having a girlfriend at 22...and he never will!!

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So lots of back story, but lovely guy, newly divorced, dating 2 months, tells me he's not ready for a relationship yet, we decide not to see each other again. I'm fairly crushed, but decide to get back on it and see if I can get on with my life and meet someone - fired up tinder again and noticed he had just relived his account - swiped to say yes to him and we matched within minutes and then he logged off immediately.

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I came out of a pretty toxic relationship finally in October after asking my ex to move out for about 8 months - we were together for about 14 months in total and he'd always tell me I was too fat (I run marathons and am a UK 14 so curvy and comfortable in my body) I then found he'd set up a profile on a dervish website looking to meet women who he could choke during sex and be his submissives. He even went on a date whilst he told me he was working so couldn't move his stuff out! Anyway he's out, gone and I finally feel happy and more like myself. I'm in my mid 30s and prior to this horrible guy was married and with another guy for 12 years - we're now divorced as he got depressed, became an alcoholic and totally gave up on life and refused to work. We're amicable, just finalising final financial separation details.

I started chatting to a guy on Tinder (I'd initially seen his profile and thought he looked lovely months previous when I'd been checking out if horrible boyfriend was on the dating site again whilst we were together.... But obviously did nothing as I was still living with my ex despite trying to get him to move out) and we met at the start of November- I remember not even wanting to go out for drinks in the end.

We had two lovely dates where we chatted and enjoyed our time together, but he didn't make a move. Our 3rd date at the end of November however was amazing and we started early (he had the day off and suggested I take the afternoon off to to start early which I did!) we got drunk and I asked him why he was single - he'd been with his ex 10 years, they got married around last September and within 3 months he'd found out that she'd been sleeping with her boss even before they got married. This time last year they were away on honeymoon and he was just finding things out! He moved out in January and they're now divorced.

I asked why he'd not tried to make a move and he said he was shy as he's never really dated before (much like me after I'd split from my husband) so then the drink took over and we spent the rest of the evening kissing like teenagers.

I stayed over at his and he was lovely the next morning making breakfast including fresh orange and getting me a warm towel for a shower. Since then we've met up about 7 times and he took a day off work so we could have a day trip together. We've cooked each other dinner, hevinvited me to a work function (I already had other plans) and told me that he'd mentioned me to his Mum.

I've not seen him now since the Sunday before Christmas and his messages started getting a bit colder than they had been. I left him to it on The 26th, but after nearly 2 days if silence I messaged him and after a few back and forth he told me that Christmas had been really tough and made him wobble as he'd found the change to routine without his ex really difficult and that he felt things between us had happened really quickly. He wants to talk when we're both back home again as he's "not sure he's ready for a full on relationship whatever that means" as it's the first relationship he's had in 10 years and feels as though he should be taking it "very seriously" and doesn't want to "end up being a dick about things because he's not ready"

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Met a guy on POF back in the summer and we lost touch. We reconnected and he was so excited, telling me how glad he was that he found me again, etc. etc. This lead to a couple weeks of many, many flirty texts, long phone calls, initiated by him a bulk of the time, and some really intense deep conversation getting to know each other. We agreed to meet and leading up to the date, there was a lot of mutual excitement expressed on both sides, him even saying on a couple times how he doesn’t want to scare me off and how much he likes how this is going etc. All and all, I felt I found a genuinely good guy that had a lot of potential. Date night was Saturday night and he took me on a fantastic date, dinner, comedy club. There were a couple passionate little kissing sessions after dinner, and then some fooling around at his place (He said no to the sex, not that I offered, but just the he did not want to move too fast with this with me). I left and sent him a message after I got home telling him I had a great time, and he responded likewise. I did tease him (Screenshot) a little but then he went a little dark. He knew that I was going to be busy Sunday and so I did not make a huge deal out of reaching out to him or vice versa. I also wanted to let a little dust settle from our date to allow some breathing space

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Let's call him John. He was my student (in two different subjects) while I was teaching in the university several years ago; I was in my mid-20s that time. In our 5-6pm class (Anthropology), he always volunteered to carry my books for me or whatever stuff I was carrying back to the faculty room, and sometimes he would stay behind to ask some questions about the lectures I gave. More than a year later, John and I went out with two other close student friends of mine (a guy and a girl). They were graduating that summer. The others said that John had something to tell me, but couldn't. From the way they teased him, I felt I knew what it was about. We went to a karaoke bar and had a few beers, but he still couldn't muster the courage to tell me. They slept over at my place, I cooked them breakfast and they were off. By that time, I had my son with me (from my ex-husband), and I already had a boyfriend who wasn't living with us. Fast forward, about three years later, we meet again... John, myself and the other guy student who was with us earlier; the girl couldn't make it coz she was working in another city. There was a festival that time and we ended up going to a number of bars. John was already married. I knew about this because a mutual friend of ours was in touch with us both and she told me. John only knew the girl for about a month when he got her pregnant. She was from Chicago though her parents were the same nationality as us. We are Southeast Asians. Anyway, so they had to get married. Actually, I met John one time when he was with that girl (not yet married) and I was pregnant with my daughter (with my boyfriend). We were living in the same neighborhood when he went back to the city I was living in for further studies (grad school). Anyway, back to that night of the festival, John's wife was in Chicago and he was still finishing his master's and supposed to migrate to the US that year in July. We were quite drunk and were dancing. The other guy left us to talk to some former schoolmates he saw, so it was just John and me. He started asking me about my relationship, how I was and the kids. By that time, I had already broken up with my daughter's father for more than four months. So I told him. Then he asked me if I knew he named his daughter after me. I was stupefied. We danced and talked and drank some more. We went to a hotel and did it. It was very intense... built up after years of waiting on his side. From there, i embarked on a full-fledged love affair "with an expiration date" I always said. My friends knew, and his friends knew. He was leaving in July and I told him I wanted a clean breakup in May. He reluctantly agreed. We were very happy. But in my mind I was tortured by guilt and the thought that ours would have a definite ending. By mid-May, I broke up with him. He still continued to text me... and call, though I usually did not answer. He gave me a gift he bought when he went to one famous island with his friends. I gave it back through his bestfriend, including the letter that came with it... not because I wanted to be mean and hurt him. I couldn't bring myself to destroy them or to throw them away; I couldn't keep them either. He stopped trying to contact me after that. Two days before his flight, at dawn, he came to my place and we made love. That was the last time we saw each other. Through the years, however, he kept in touch... through occasional emails (on AOL - but I had since stopped checking when I forgot my password), on Friendster (remember? before Facebook and Twitter?), and by phone where John would call or text me out of the blue, asking about my life, the kids, etc. Now, more than ten years after we last saw each other, John told me he is divorcing his wife. He has two kids like me. He told me he will come to see me here in Dubai (where I now work - been here for 8 years) on his way to our home country where his parents are. This year he had been fairly regular in his communication with me, and he confessed about three months ago how he regrets not waiting for me to be free. He said he wasted so many years waiting because he himself was not free in between. I love him. I loved him before, in those few months we were together. I had boyfriends in between. When he came back into my life early this year, I had been without a relationship for over a year. I believe my mind is clear, and I know I love him. But our journey will not be an easy one. He has his divorce and I have my annulment (from my ex-husband from whom I have been separated from for more than 12 years) to take care of. He will only be in Dubai for 25 hours. Then for another 8 hours on his way back from home to Chicago.

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Meet on line both of us divorce. ..live in different states. He Said he works. A lot that interferes him having a relationship .We chat maybe every other day he doesn't like to text at work . I wound like to text more to get to know him better . He never ask about my weekend or say good morning or goodnight. I told him that feel like I was getting to. Know him and maybe this was not gonna work out.

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Does he like me or is he just being friendly...

By ellie515 | Sep 16 2014

I have a friend who I've known since childhood, but just reconnected with six months ago. Our children are friends. We have been "hanging out" when our boys hang out. He is nice, and we get along.

Recently he's started sending me funny texts, like a picture with a funny saying, or am inappropriate picture with a funny saying. The other day I texted back and told him thanks for making me laugh. He texted back and said he's here for me.

Today he randomly sends a picture text again. We've never hung out without the boys, because I am still going through a divorce and not ready for anything.

He does call and ask to get the kids together, every two weeks or so.

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Has he cooled off after things got physical...

By lilyandme | Aug 31 2014

I have met a nice guy from a dating website. We are both in our 40s and have been married before...so not teenagers. Last Thursday was our fourth "date". We met at his house and he cooked me a lovely meal. I didn't intend for things to get physical but it felt "right" and we did end up sleeping together, then I went home as it was a work night next day he texted me a lovely message saying how much he had enjoyed the evening and could we do it again. I texted back yes when and where...bt he hasn't responded!

I now feel like a stupid child. I'm not used to dating (I was with my husband for 20 years before we split up a year ago) but I suppose that I had silly expectations that if I took things to a physical level with a guy he might also take things a bit more seriously and at least answer my text messages promptly. One friend says I should just text him again in case my message got lost my other friend says he is probably dating other people and he's just not that into me and I should just leave things. Its absolutely killing me not knowing either way .

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Hi, i just got to know a guy for few days, hes separated n just broke off from his ex. he simply keep pushing me to marry him n said he will come n meet me. after while i accepted n said yes cuz i find him n honest n disciplined person. i have asked him favour to help me experiment self development practice for 40days, n he dedicatedly committed to me daily, even though we had serious fights n refused to talk him but he will complete his part n msg me n after he will talk to me as per normal but kept saying i hurt him a lot, etc. I notice after i say YES, to him, he said he cant come cuz hes financially down n his separation status is a problem n never talk about marriage anymore but daily he sent me text....

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So I met a guy on Tinder two and a half months ago. We chatted for about three weeks until he suggested we meet up. We went to lunch, he kissed me in the parking lot. Since then we've seen each other one or two times a week - we've done dinner and trivia (then back to his place), he asked me over while a lot of his friends were there, so I've met them...I'd say it was a week or so after out first lunch date when we first had sex, and it's been pretty frequent. We've texted everyday since our lunch date, when we exchanged numbers. He met a few of my friends last week on my birthday. He met us out, was holding my hand everywhere we went and just being super sweet to me and my friends all night. We have a date planned for Friday to go kayaking.

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What do I do now...

By deatta | Jul 09 2014

I am MADLY in love with a younger man. "Kyle" and I have been friends for about 3yrs now, he had worked his dad on some construction on my home, however when I met him, I was married, and he was far too young for me. I went about 5mths without seeing Kyle, and we ended up running into each other at a mutual friend’s house one weekend (who happens to live next door to me). When I saw him, he gave me a great big hug, asked me how I was doing and I filled him in that I was now getting divorced. That evening he came over with our friends “Lisa & Ryan” to hang out. We laughed and joke and he made a comment about how he used to stare at me at the house when I ran around in my short shorts. I didn’t think anything of it except that he is young and horny!
Now, Kyle, back in December when we ran into each other again, was turning 18 at the end of the month…and I was 27. Now I don’t see this as much of a problem as most people do simply because my own parents are 24yrs apart! This is normal for me!
Kyle made some comments about maybe “hooking up” and at the time I was going threw a divorce and was looking for some fun! I thought “why not, he’s young and probably has stamina for DAYS!” So, we slept together, and continued to do so for a few weeks while he was in town. His dad had called me to check in and told me that he knew everything and he was happy for Kyle and I and actually hoped he would make something more of it than just sex. I was ecstatic for some reason.
Kyle went home for his birthday at the end of December and when he came back up in the middle of January, things were different right away. He sat me down and told me he had a girlfriend that he really liked and wanted to see how things were going to go. I agreed to back off, and we agreed no more sex. A few days before Valentine’s Day I hung out with our mutual friends and Kyle, I got completely drunk, made an ass out of myself and he took care of me. One thing led to another and we fooled around, never slept together but it was still him cheating. I told him that it was no different than us sleeping together and he needed to figure out what he was doing, he left the next day.
He came back the weekend of St. Patrick’s Day, he called me and told me to head on over. I put him off, I told him I was out with my ex (ex-husband, we have a great friendship) and that I had to make a few appearances and then I would make my way back to town. It was HOURS later by the time I made it to our friends house, and everyone was almost sleeping. They all got up, we had a few beers and we were all ready for bed. Kyle followed me to bed, I asked him if he still had a girlfriend and he said yes, I told him to stay on his own side or find a new room! That didn’t happen. We slept together…again, and it was like that for a week or so. Then he started feeling guilty. I told him he needed to figure out what he was doing, it wasn’t fair to me or to his girlfriend at home. Later that day he called her and told her he was moving here because there was someone else in his life and he was sorry. *yes I heard the whole conversation*
His dad had called me later on that evening and had informed me that he had talked to Kyle that day and he told him things were different with me, that the sex wasn’t just sex, it was us making love. I let it go, I figured when Kyle was ready to tell me that he would.
Standing on my porch just a few hours after he had broke up with his girlfriend he asked me to be his…I of course said yes! He had to leave a few days later for a funeral, he was gone 2days, and it seemed like the longest 2days of my life. When he came home, we were inseparable! We had talked about our futures, the house I was finishing, our jobs, and even talked about having kids (I already have 1, who Kyle adores and my son adores Kyle). Things were perfect, up until about 6wks ago. He called me and we talked for over an hour. I asked him if he would be around for the 4th of July and he said he didn’t know…I was obviously upset and then he proceeded to tell me we have no future together, but we can still stay friends. I have been heart broke every since! He still calls me every few days, we still talk about the same things we did before, and then he called one night in June and said he was coming up for a few hours and wanted to see me, NOTHING happened, he hugged me and that was it. We hung out with his brother for a few hours and he left. He called again and said he would be up July 3rd. I was happy, but had plans and I wasn’t ignoring my son for him…I did my own thing that night and when I was finally done, I pulled into our friends house and he was there. The little girl part of me wanted to jump up and down, but I played it cool. I didn’t imitate the hug or the conversation. We all hung out for a bit and I told him I was going home, I was beat. He asked if he could stay with me since he didn’t want to put Lisa and Ryan out and he had cut ties with everyone else in town, I said yes. I tried to play hard to get but in an hour, I caved! All weekend I caved…I asked him at the end of the weekend why he came, he said it was to get away from his roommates because he works with them all day, and it might be because he misses me a little. I don’t know what to do, he has told me he loved me, but then he took it back. Im LOST! I thought he would be a rebound, but it turned into so much more! Im in love and don’t know what to do! I want him in my life…I don’t NEED any man, but I WANT HIM! Ive had the chance to fix my marriage and get back with my ex husband and I chose Kyle and then he walked away. I talked to his dad who claims its because Kyle is young and scared and doesn’t know how to react to being in love. Apparently hes told his dad that hes in love with me but wont tell me! PLEASE HELP!

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Met her on sex site, found out by daughter, divorced 10 months later after 33yrs marriage, thought it was love 2nd time round n truly still love her however she wants freedom n date if and when she likes, dumped by text as soon as we got home from NYC which I paid for.....feel so much in love

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