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Relationship

My now ex boyfriend of eight months has depression and is going...

By amberjadej | Jan 24 2016

Boyfriend blindsided me and dumped me? Long?

Now I'm Wondering

My now ex boyfriend of eight months has depression and is going through a lot with school/work and is stressed a lot. He doesn't seem to have good coping skills (he admits it) and things build up and he runs away. We'd been fighting a lot off and on (not terrible fights, but they were every couple days). Yesterday he went over to a friend's house and was supposed to come home around 1 or 2 am. He texted me saying that he'd had too many beers and was just going to crash there and would be home around noon. We were supposed to go out today and have a nice dinner and have fun (he was still saying he wanted to go right before he went to bed at his friend's). Well he gets home at noon, comes in and puts my dog in the kennel and tells me that he brought the guys over to meet me (he'd tried to introduce me before but the timing wasn't right). So they come in and I walk out and immediately something seems weird. None of them are looking at me and I say, "Hi!" but no one answers and I notice boxes. My boyfriend then says, "These are my best friends... I've known these guys for years and they're my rock." He paused and then said, "And the reason we have all of these boxes here is because you're out of here.. we're done. This is done." I was completely shocked and couldn't understand what was happening. I asked him to talk in private and at first he resisted, but then agreed. We went into the bedroom and he literally set a timer of 5 minutes. We talked and he says he has too much going on, we're too different and that in general, he's not happy with us. He claims it's not me but "us".
He says he's happy sometimes but not as much as he should be and that he brought his friends because he knows he'd not stay strong about breaking up otherwise. Here's the part where it starts getting weird: he filmed us when we were talking in private to show that things had ended "amicably".
We'd had a couple of a couple day breakups and he never did any of that stuff or had brought his friends over. He was also acting totally weird and I'm getting a vibe like there was something else. It seemed like he was angry but trying to act normal. This might tie in: there was a weird woman texting both him and me yesterday saying she wanted to see him again and telling me that he was cheating on me with her.
We both thought it was this 45 year old lady who lives across the street that has a crush on him. When he got back from his friend's house, he admitted (after me asking a bunch of times) that he was suspicious it was me. The whole filming me while we were talking privately and having his friends there makes me feel like he thinks I'm crazy. He claimed the friends were there to enforce that we actually broke up and because it was hard for him and needed support.

I should add ( just additional info) since it won't let me update anymore that just a couple of days ago he was saying he really, really loved me and that breaking up with me before was a mistake and that he wasn't going to let it happen again.
Also, when I asked him if he thought i was the girl texting him, he said he it didn't matter and claimed it only played a small role in the breakup. I don't believe him because everything was fine before he went to his friend's for the night. He admitted that they said it could possibly be me texting him. This was all very sudden and I'm very shocked. He just told me yesterday that he thought we'd still be together months from now and we'd just laugh about the whole weird person texting us thing... And then he dumped me. he's 26 and I'm 22 by the way

3 Comments

2009

Top Commenter

24 Jan

If you were living together it may well be for legal reasons that he filmed the amicable breakup. Depending how long you have lived together you may well legally be entitled to a percentage of his things (defacto). Either way it sounds quite planned and intentional on his part.

morrisann

Top Commenter

12 Apr

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29 May

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